


Kiss Me Till The Clouds Grin

by ur_the_puppy



Series: Fallen [2]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Established Relationship, F/F, Fluff, Sequel, Wolf Companion, a tinsy winsy bit of angst, also aden is a wolf and i love him, hybrid!clarke, still kinda sorta grounder clarke
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-23
Updated: 2017-12-02
Packaged: 2019-02-05 21:48:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 27,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12803082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ur_the_puppy/pseuds/ur_the_puppy
Summary: After a panther attack, being saved by a stranger, growing feels for said stranger, being kidnapped and then saved all over again, Lexa Woods had had a bit of an interesting break. But her break is coming to a very strange end, and soon the new school year will be starting. And this year, Lexa has Clarke, the stranger who saved her life from the woods, as someone she needs to help guide through.The fact that Clarke wansn't technically human and had barely stepped foot into modern society was only going to be one of her problems.orthe sequel to Hold Me Till The Stars Dim





	1. Darling Your Laugh (Part 1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, it's finally back!  
> so I'm really nervous for this bc unlike my other stories it's pretty much all fluff with little angst and drama and it's really just nothing but fluff. im a little anxious on how it's going to be received bc ive never really written just such fluff before but im really hoping you guys enjoy. even if i myself dont like it, i hope you do.  
> Also just a quick note, it’s not imperative that you read the first one to understand what’s going on. I’ve done a little prologue to catch anyone up who can’t be bothered or has a memory as shit as mine and needs a refresher. If you’re still left a little confused then feel free to drop a comment and I’ll explain for you.  
> (for that Full Immersion listen to: 17 by Youth Lagoon) (also it's only me that goes over this, so if typos are something that make your mind implode, kindly point them out and ill fix them for you)  
> Enjoy the chapter!

—(Start of prologue)—

Lexa Woods had had an interesting break.

Well, so far, her break had been interesting. She still had a week left till the term and new school year started, her final year as well. Being honest, most of her break was actually very dull. Though it’s mostly on her. It was her who had been pushing everything out: her family, her friends, herself. She had lost someone she’d loved deeply just four months ago. Someone who still stubbornly held on to a piece of her heart. That stubborn hold had proved almost fatal in the past months, as Lexa had ignored everyone and threw herself into anything that let her forget.

Her friends had been growing increasingly worried. And, truly they had every right to be. After all, Lexa hadn’t been in the best mental state. But her friends, though Lexa pushed them out, never quite gave up. Especially her sister Anya, who had suggested the idea of a camping trip. Well… not quite suggested, as more if she didn’t go then Anya would, as Lexa liked to quote, ‘drag you by your ear up a cliff if only to push you off and haul you back up again’.

In theory, the camping trip would’ve worked out great.

In practice, it _almost_ worked out great.

The only slight hiccup was the fact that a panther had attacked the camp on the first night and had dragged Lexa into woods with its jaws on her leg, her friends and siblings forced to watch as she was pulled out of sight. She was sure she was going to die in those moments the panther had her. Really, she would have.

Except she’d been saved by an angel.

Well, not quite.

Part angel actually.

This half-angel half-human went by the name of Clarke Griffin, as Lexa learnt on her first night with her. At first she was a stranger, who Lexa regarded with some level of caution, a stranger who helped heal her leg and had taken her to her home; a cave deep within the forests. Though Lexa was wary, the blonde seemed to be born with the ability to make Lexa feel like she could breathe again since the past four months, and it wasn’t long till Lexa gave up on her guardedness, and instead lent some trust to the stranger.

Together they made their way back to the camp. Lexa was slow, mainly due to the crutches she had to use to walk. Clarke had brought them too, clearly handmade, and this would not be the first surprise that Lexa would learn about Clarke. During her journey, she discovered a number of things.

One, Clarke had a companion who was a wolf named Aden; two, Clarke had been living in the forests since she was very young; three, Clarke had the ability to heal animals and people; four, she was incredibly beautiful and Lexa often found herself staring at her a moment too long; five, she was a very good kisser.

At least, those were the important things she learned.

It was just as they made it back to the camp, after two days of trekking and a night where Lexa woke up with Clarke’s arms around her, did Lexa find out with a start why Clarke had been living in the woods. She was being hunted by an organisation called the Mountain Men, people who had murdered her father as well. They had secured the camp, killed the police officers that had been roaming, and upon finding this the pair, trio if you counted Aden, ran as fast as they could away. Unfortunately though, not far enough. It was through this that Lexa learnt Clarke could heal. And, when she had taken down any mountain man that got close enough, that she had been raised by wolves.

But there were too many of them, and in fear of them killing Clarke Lexa made a split second decision to shove Clarke down the steeping hill with Aden and for her to stay behind to buy her time. Since Lexa was an innocent in their scenario, they only kidnapped her. She woke up in the camp, a vile man named Cage Wallace greeting her with a grin. He was the man in charge, and thus the man that had interrogated her. He didn’t have long though, as with a gun pointed to her head, the camp was suddenly overrun with wolves.

Clarke had rescued her. Not by herself mind you, but with the help of around twenty wolves and a bear, all who were in Clarke’s debt and had come fight for her. Later on, when the bodies were still and Cage was gagged and unconscious, did Lexa learn that the two packs that Clarke had brought, she had actually known the alphas, had grown and raised them. The bear was a return favour for when she had healed it when she was eight.

The wolf that had been by Clarke’s side for entire time who Lexa at first thought was just a highly unusual pet, Lexa found Aden to be not just a wolf, but something of a brother. Lexa hadn’t asked too much of Clarke’s past, but she now knew that Clarke had been living with wolves since she was five, and had rare interactions with society. Though there was one thing that Lexa _really_ wanted to ask about but she hadn’t yet because she’d only known for the girl for three days. Even if it felt like more.

Clarke could grow wings.

Lexa had seen them in the battle against the mountain man, and even just thinking about them brought her heart to a halt. Wings. Clarke truly was part angel. Her father had been an actual angel, marrying a human, Clarke’s mother. In the aftermath of the battle, they had sat together on a log and discussed what was to come. To Lexa’s wonderful surprise, Clarke had agreed to finally come back to society, a place she had never been. She’d also admitted to having feels for her too, as Lexa couldn’t fight off her heart any longer and had kissed her. Though Clarke was adorably confused having never been kissed before, she learnt fast.

So.

It had been an interesting past few days.

—(End of prologue)—

 

Lexa knew she was close now.

She recognised the streets, even the muffled sounds through the car windows. Even if she had only been gone for a max of four days, so much had happened it felt like she was coming home after being away for years. Her hands were trembling in both apprehension and excitement. There was no doubt she was looking forward to seeing her family again, but there was this lingering uncertainty in the back of her head that lurked like a shadow, muttering the things she was trying so hard to ignore.

She trusted her family. With her life. But she didn’t know how much they knew, and hence how much she could tell them how much _she_ knew. She’d decided she wouldn’t mention Clarke, not yet, but it still left the problem of the mountain men and how she’d survived in the woods for four days on her own. Lexa didn’t like lying about something so important, but what else was she meant to do? She couldn’t just tell them that, ‘oh yeah it was fine I just got saved by a part-angel girl and rescued by multiple wolves and a literal bear it was _fine_ ’.

No need to be put in the psychiatric ward any time soon.

The car began to slow down and Lexa subconsciously clenched her fists. The police officer driving didn’t notice, but she did glance at her through the front mirror. She had red hair like fire, and though Lexa had never sat well with authority, her brown eyes were kind and soft.

“We’re coming up. You doing alright back there?” she asked.

Lexa just gave her a strained smile.

She saw the woman stare at her a little longer through the mirror. But when Lexa purposely avoided her gaze, she let out a tiny sigh and focused back on the road. Lexa trained her sight on the window beside her, mentally counting how many houses till she’d be home. Ten, nine, eight, seven…

Soon they were pulling up. The car rolled to a slow stop, the gravel crackling under the wheels. The police officer pulled the handbrake and fell back into her seat with a huff. She craned her neck behind her to look back at Lexa. Lexa, after still staring numbly at her home through the car window, brought her gaze back to meet the officer’s. The woman gave her a small smile.

“You sure you’re right, kid?”

When Lexa didn’t say anything the officer bit her lip.

“You went through a lot you know. If… if it still feels too much, I can drive around your neighbourhood for a couple laps. I ain’t got much to do today, and it’s always fun to drive by a gang of teens and watch ‘em scramble.”

Lexa opened her mouth then closed it. She swallowed the stubborn lump in her throat. “Yeah. That’d be good.” She said quietly.

The officer’s smile turned wide. “I knew I could get a word outta you.” She threw her a wink before she turned back around, kicked the car back into gear and pushed the car forward. The officer stuck by her word. They drove around her neighbourhood for another ten minutes or so, and during that time Lexa took the effort to even her breathing and her heart which apparently couldn’t decide to be either calm or racing. She was glad when the officer didn’t try to initiate conversation. As much as Lexa appreciated the gesture of her giving her some time to gather herself, her mind was in too many places at once to carry a talk.

It felt all too soon when they pulled back into their previous spot. Lexa let out a shuddering breath, and when the officer turned in her seat once more to give her that same reassuring smile, Lexa smiled a bit back. That seemed to be enough for her because then she was getting out of the car and walking over to her side. She pulled open the passenger door, and the rush of hot air hit Lexa unexpectedly. She had been so used to the air con in the car she’d managed to forget they were still slap bang in the middle of summer.

Lexa got out of the car and pulled herself to her feet. The officer was tall, but her posture was relaxed enough that Lexa didn’t feel intimidated. Ever since Costia passed she had grown a sense of constant unease around cops. It was a low hanging sense of dread that sat in her stomach like a ball of lead. Some part of her always had that irrational sense that anytime she was with a cop they were going to say those words again, they were going to struggle to look her in the eye as they told her in their softest voice that someone she loved was gone.

And though that unease did linger in her stomach, with this officer, it felt less than usual.

She put her hand gently on Lexa’s shoulder, but when Lexa instinctually jerked back from the touch the officer brought it back to her side. For a moment Lexa just stood still, staring at her home in front of her. She stared at the waist-length metal fence that once upon a time she had to stand on her tip toes to reach over; stared at the even lawn, though while the grass all remained the same height there were patches of yellow as the summer won over the feeble attempts of water to keep the green alive; stared at the tall brick house, more rustic than modern, a few stubborn vines climbing up the side red walls. She stared at the white front door, and as if by looking at it alone, it suddenly burst open.

Lincoln was the one to come barreling through. Everyone in the family seemed to be born with an affinity for fitness because it took just seconds for Lincoln to burst across the lawn and collide into Lexa with a massive bear hug. He held her tight to his chest and only when Lexa let out breathless cough from how hard he was hugging her did he finally pull back. His hug had lifted her off the ground, and sheepishly did he place her back down.

Even if Lexa still had that apprehension about what she was going to have to tell them, her face still lit up in joy and her smile was brighter than the glaring sun above them. Lincoln was looking the same.

“Sorry for the uh, attack hug,” he apologised, nervously glancing to the officer at her side. “It’s just, you know, you’re here. You’re…”

“Alive. Yeah.” Lexa let out a wet a chuckle before she pushed forward and pulled him into a hug of her own. She wasn’t the best when it came to physical affection, Lincoln was the ‘feeler’ in the family, but there was too much happiness in her chest to smother. She breathed in his scent and had to screw her eyes shut to stop the tears. “Thank you.” She mumbled into his neck.

She felt him chuckle into her own. “Thank _you_ Lexa. _Ai hod yu in sis_.”

“ _Ai hod you in seintaim, bro._ ”

It was her who pulled away. She brought her arm back to her sides; suddenly feeling embarrassed when she looked over to the officer beside her who she had somehow forgotten was there. She opened her mouth to make an excuse, to apologise or at least say something to ease this feeling in her stomach, but the woman beat her to it with a shake of the head.

“You’re fine. I’ve seen more than one reunion, you’ve nothing to feel embarrassed about.” She gave her a kind smile before nodding her head at the now open door to her house. “Looks like someone else is keen to see you home. I’ll talk with your Mum before heading off.”

“Yeah, okay sure.”

The officer dipped her head. “All good. Well, if you could lead me to her than I’ll leave you to it.”

Lexa nodded and turned to the door, and her lingering smile at seeing her brother lit up all over again when she saw Anya casually leaning against the doorframe. Lexa wasn’t surprised nor offended that she hadn’t come rushing at her like Lincoln, as she could clearly see the wide smile her sister was wearing which was something she had seen a very few times.

So Lexa ran to her.

Anya easily opened her arms in preparation and even let out a dramatic _oof_ when Lexa collided with her. Lexa ignored the sound with practiced ease and instead held her tight, her sister holding her back with equal intensity. Just as she was about to pull away she heard Anya whisper in her ear.

“ _Ai shanen yu laik klir._ ”

Lexa nodded into her hair. “ _Ai seintaim._ ”

Eventually she pulled away, and when she did Anya lightly pushed her back, puffing up her chest and clearing her throat, as if the affection she’d shown was a cold she could cough out. But it was all done playfully and so Lexa didn’t stop her smile. Soon Lincoln and the officer were walking up, and the officer gave Lexa a slight tip of her hat before she pushed through and let Lincoln lead her to Indra. Both her and Anya lingered by the door before they went through with them.

Anya looked to her, her face sobering slightly. “Well, I’m glad to see your dumbass has managed to come back in one piece.”

“Not one minute being back and you’ve already insulted me.”

Anya smirked at her, but the curve of lips dipped more into the territory of love than mischief. “Just because you disappeared doesn’t mean I don’t get to insult you.”

Lexa scoffed in reply. “Asshole.”

“What else would I be?” Anya reached forward and ruffled her hair, as for once Lexa had her hair loose and not in its usual braids. Lexa gave her a scowl but before she could lunge forward and retaliate her sister was ducking out and into the house. Lexa chased her through, but she stumbled to a halt at the sight of her mother and the officer standing in the living room. They were talking by the fireplace, childhood photos lined on top in frames next to them.

Both her and Anya had been adopted, Lexa’s biological mother had died at birth and Anya’s had passed when she was only one. Lincoln was her only child that she herself had carried, but family will always stretch far past blood, and the bond they all held was something akin to unbreakable. There wasn’t anything she wouldn’t do if they’d ask. Indra must have sensed her staring, and when her gaze switched from the officers to hers her smile grew blinding.

Lexa had very rarely seen that smile.

“ _Strikon, monin hou_.” She said, and when her arms opened Lexa quickly burst forward for the last of her family to hug. Indra somehow held her tighter than Lincoln, engulfing her completely in warmth and security. It took a lot of effort for Lexa to hold back her tears. Still a few stubborn ones broke through her mental walls, but Indra didn’t seem to care. Lexa was finding herself uncaring too. It didn’t matter if she had been anxious to come home, being in her mother’s arms after everything that happened, after all the shit that had come down on her – the feeling of comfort and love was overwhelming.

Indra didn’t pull away till Lexa did. And even then, her hands stayed at Lexa’s shoulders as she held her at arms length. “Look at you,” she breathed, and for the first time in Lexa’s life did she see her mother’s shiny eyes. “My bravest _yongon._ ”

Lexa let out a tear-filled laugh, especially when Anya’s voice called out across to the living room. “Oh, are we playing favourites now Mum?”

“Anya,” Indra scolded, and from where her older sister had been sitting on the stairs to the second floor did she hastily jump to her feet and scramble up. Indra shook her head fondly before looking back at Lexa. “Your sister has been insufferable these past few days you know.”

“Even more than usual?”

Her mother’s smile widened. “Even more than usual.”

Indra let a small sigh as she trailed her hands down Lexa’s arms. She turned to the officer at her side. “Thank you for bringing her home. If that’s all…”

“Yeah, we’re all good here. Uh, she will need to come down to the station tomorrow for some questions though.”

The smile slipped from Indra’s face. “Why?”

The officer glanced around the room nervously, and Lexa didn’t blame her – Indra’s face currently was something you’d never be comfortable staring at. “Your daughter was found at the scene of a… massacre. She was taken and held against her will. There is still much that needs to be answered for.” She swallowed. “Captain.”

“Two days. Not tomorrow.” Indra ordered narrowing her eyes. The officer hastily nodded, seeming to want nothing more than to get out of her captain’s glare. “Good. You may leave then.”

She looked much relieved to be leaving, but just before she left she paused, her eyes snagging on Lexa. The woman offered her a genuine smile. “I’m glad you’re alright, kid. Take care of yourself.” And with one last glance to Indra’s stoic gaze, she nodded and headed for the front door.

When it was the two of them again Lexa turned her sight to her Mum. That harshness that had taken Indra’s face easily fell away at meeting her daughter’s eye.

“You didn’t have to scare her, _nomon_. I could have gone tomorrow.” Lexa said with a frown.

But Indra just shook her head. “No. You just got back, you need time.”

“She _was_ nice you know, you promise you won’t give her all the crappy cases now, right?”

Indra pursed her lips.

Lexa sighed. “ _Nomi_.”

“Yes, yes. She will be fine.” Lexa raised a brow at her response, but Indra just gave her a small smile. “Well, perhaps one.” She admitted.

“I suppose that’s better than all.” Lexa grumbled. Her mother cracked another smile before she gently placed her hand on her shoulder, nudging her into the direction of the kitchen. Lexa followed without question, hopping up and sitting herself at a breakfast bar, the plastic stool she was in jostling slightly at her weight. Indra went around to the other side so she was opposite to Lexa. She leaned forward, her hands clasped together as she rested them on the bench.

It was all very serious, and Lexa felt sudden anxiety of the talk that was about to ensue.

But Indra seemed to sense it. “You don’t need to be nervous _hodnes_.” She said softly.

Lexa didn’t say anything, but instead nervously waited for whatever she was about to say.

“Lexa, what you have been through is something that I’d hoped you’d never know.” Indra started, making sure to keep her words gentle.

Lexa nodded stiffly. “I know, but you couldn’t have stopped it anyway, it’s pretty hard to stop a kidnapping you don’t even— “

“That’s not what I’m talking about.”

Lexa paused, frowning.

Indra sighed. She briefly glanced downwards before raising her gaze. “I’m talking about losing someone you love so young.”

Lexa felt her heart stop. _Costia_. She was talking about Costia. She wasn’t prepared for a conversation on what had gone down in the past few days, but Costia was a topic she was even _more_ unprepared for. It was strange, in through all the chaos that had happened she had finally found an odd sense of peace about the girl who had been taken from her, how only through a harsh check into reality did Lexa find herself releasing a breath, not sucking one in, when she thought her name.

But no one else knew that. She had been out of the control the past four months, she knew that, and everyone else knew that – even the camping trip was only meant to initially be something to help her with it. With bitter irony Lexa supposed the camping trip had. Just not in any way any of them were expecting. Indra was still looking at her, but from the way she was Lexa didn’t know if she was waiting for her to say something or building her own self up to say something.

When Lexa remained silent, her throat seeming to decide to close itself up, Indra spoke up again. “I know that our family isn’t particularly the best at, emotions, and such,” she let out a quiet chuckle. “I believe Lincoln is the only emotionally competent one in the family.”

She caught her gaze, but Lexa still said nothing.

“You’re allowed to be human Lexa. I know you fight to be strong; to not let your own self drag you down – but sometimes there is greater strength in admitting than denying.” She unclasped her fingers, reaching out her hand and letting it gently lie on one of hers. Lexa stared down at where her mother’s hand touched her own. “I can’t say what it was like for you to lose Costia. I do not know. And I understand that this is you, and only you will do what you will no matter what I say. So please, at least, just consider my words.”

Lexa raised her gaze to meet Indra’s.

Indra offered her a small smile. “You are not weak for seeking help. I will not see you as anything different than the incredible person I know you to be. If you want to find help, than I will aid you in any way I can. If you do not, I will still stand by you. But, I ask that _you_ truly ask herself what you want.” She slowly pulled her hand away, leaning back. “I don’t expect an answer straight away. This isn’t something so simple. All I ask is that when you decide you let me know.” Indra nodded over Lexa’s shoulder. “Now, I believe your sister and brother are waiting very patiently for you upstairs. I won’t hold you back from them any longer.”

With one last small smile Indra stood back up, shuffling back and turning around to open the fridge, probably to get started on lunch. Lexa at first sat numbly in her stool. Then, slowly, she peeled herself off. Just as she was about to leave the kitchen she lingered, her hand resting against the pale wall to her side. Lexa turned so she was facing Indra.

“Mum,” she called. Indra spun around to look at her, her fingers still wrapped around the fridge door. “Thank you. I…” Lexa swallowed the lump in her throat. “Thank you.”

Indra just smiled at her. “Go,” she said gently. “Your sister is probably wearing a burn mark into the carpet with all her pacing.”

Lexa gave her a grateful nod and an even more grateful smile before she finally listened and turned back around. She was slow to reach the stairs and clamber her way up. Her hand held tightly to the wooden rail beside her. She was nervous to go up stairs. This was it, the conversation she had been dreading since she’d gotten in the police car to get home. _This_ was the interrogation that had made her want to drive a couple laps around the neighbourhood to delay the moment she’d step into her home.

But still she climbed the stairs. Stubbornness was her only motivator at this point, so Lexa clung to the common feeling with all she had. She was going to get through this. She was. The quicker this was over, the faster she could focus on getting back to Clarke. God, even just thinking her name had her toes curling.

Lexa let out a shaky breath.

She reached the top of the stairs. In front of her was the hallway that held all the bedrooms and a study at the far back. Her and Anya shared a room, and their door was the first one on her right. Lincoln’s room sat on the left. Lexa threw a glare at it. It was possibly worrying what she’d do to have a room to herself. With a quick prayer to herself that this would over quickly and hopefully not be _too_ hellish, Lexa sucked in a sharp breath and gripped the handle to her room. She pushed it down and opened the door.

Indra had been right. Anya was pacing. Lincoln was calmly sitting on her bed behind her, but at seeing her he jumped up to his feet. Their room wasn’t too big, but it felt smaller than it was with all the stuff crammed into it. It was mostly Anya’s side that was full of so much crap, her sister was a hoarder at heart; a test from grade five, her guitar that was plastered with so many stickers it was near impossible now to make out the wood underneath, a desk with so much stuff on it Lexa had no clue how Anya managed to find anything. Her side was much cleaner, though compared to Anya’s, pretty much _anything_ would have looked cleaner.

Anya’s side had posters littering the walls, but Lexa had books. Pop up shelves were built into her wall like steps, stacked with books of so many topics and interests it was hard to decipher a pattern out of them. Lexa had always been proud of her book collection. She was a nerd at heart, and she held no shame in the fact.

Lexa slowly closed the door behind her. Both Anya and Lincoln were staring at her, but when Lexa did nothing but stare back, Anya threw out her arms.

“Well?”

“Well what?”

Anya’s eyes widened. “Lex, are you kidding me? You almost died. You were kidnapped and have been MIA for four days. You were on the _news_.”

“I was?” Lexa asked, unable not to. She knew it really wasn’t the thing she should be picking out for this conversation, but her curiosity was there all the same. How much had the news had shown? Was Clarke’s secret out?

“You’re the Captain’s daughter Lexa, of course Mum put all she could in finding you.” Lincoln explained gently. Anya threw him a glare, as this clearly wasn’t where she wanted the conversation to go, but he easily ignored her and continued. “Not much was shown. Just that a bunch of police officers were killed, the ones who sent to look for you after the… panther attack, and that all contact was lost. Also, apparently a pack of wolves ransacked the place and killed almost everyone there. And a _bear_ too?”

Lexa nodded, and from it Anya’s words died in her throat. “Yeah. The people who took me, I was saved when the wolves came. They… they got pretty much all of them.”

“Who’s ‘them’ Lexa?” Anya questioned.

Lexa glanced between them. She wasn’t going to tell them about Clarke, but she didn’t know how much she could say without them piecing together everything. Yet knowing how Anya was like anyway, Lexa inwardly caved. “The Mountain Men. I don’t know who they are, before you ask, I just know their name.”

Anya frowned. “Why did they take you?”

“They… were looking for someone, I don’t know who, just that they were seen where I’d been apparently and they mistook them for me. When they found I wasn’t who they thought I was, they held me back and tried to get me to tell them where whoever they were looking for was.” Lexa made up the lie as she went, trying to keep it as close to the truth as possible. She had to hide her breath of relief when it seemed like her siblings believed it. There was a tense silence as her words hung in the air, before Anya was speaking up again, her voice somehow both suspicious and curious.

“What happened to your ankle?”

Lexa furrowed her brows, instinctively glancing down. “What about it?”

“I saw a panther with its teeth wrapped around it.” Anya’s voice shook, ever so slightly, and Lexa only noticed because she’d known Anya her entire life. “But you haven’t even limped once. You even ran to me when you came.”

Ah.

Shit.

Anya squinted her eyes at her ankle and Lexa had to fight the urge to pull it back. “There’s not even a scar,” she muttered.

“It wasn’t that bad. That night…” Lexa blinked away the memories. “It had looked worse than it was.”

“A _panther_ had its jaws on your leg, and your saying that that wouldn’t even leave a mark?” Anya said disbelievingly.

Lexa hardened her gaze. “It’s fine, Anya. Let it go.”

“Things like that don’t just go away. It’s not physically possible.”

“I said it’s _fine_. Let it. Go.”

But Anya just stopped closer. “Are you lying? Explain to me how your ankle has just _magically_ healed, Lexa.”

“Leave it alone Anya.” Lexa growled.

“You know what—“

“Hey!” Lincoln snapped, starling them both. Lexa suddenly realised she was nose to nose with Anya, the two them getting closer and glaring without noticing. Lincoln strode up to them but even he wasn’t stupid enough to attempt to physically put himself between the two. Instead he just gave them both equal glares, though the one on Anya was harsher. “Enough. Lex just got back Ahn, and she didn’t come back home just to be interrogated by you.”

“It’s my job to interrogate her.” Anya muttered.

“No, it isn’t.” He gave her a pointed look. “Be nice. Or I’m kicking you out.”

Anya stared at him incredulously. “This is _my_ room Lincoln. You can’t kick me out.”

“I can and I will.”

They stared each other down, but it was Anya, surprisingly, who gave in. She gave Lexa another look and Lexa just raised her chin. Anya sighed and rolled her eyes. “Fine. Whatever.” She stepped back, raising her hands over her head and turning away

Lincoln looked to her with sympathetic eyes. Lexa felt herself bristle and avoided his gaze.

“How did you survive the wolves?” Lincoln asked, careful to keep his voice soft. Lexa noticed and she didn’t know if the effort pissed her off or put her at ease.

“I stayed inside. I hid in a tent.”

“A tent kept you alive against a pack of ravenous wolves?” Anya said the questioned with a scoff. She ignored Lincoln’s narrowing gaze.

Lexa ground her teeth. “There was a lot going on. They probably got too distracted to deal with me. There was a bear, you know.”

“You said they took you, held you against your will.” Lincoln bit his tongue, seeming to try and find a polite way to phrase his question. “When they held you they didn’t…”

“They didn’t do anything.” Lexa finished. “He didn’t do anything.”

“He?” Anya’s voice had lost its previous frustration. Lexa would be quick to doubt it, but it was almost fearful.

Lexa glanced between the two anxious faces before her. “Seriously, nothing happened. He just wanted to know where the person they were looking for was. When I couldn’t say anything he put a gun to my head but he didn’t shoot or anything.”

Lexa’s words shook, and she didn’t know quite get why.

Anya was staring at her different now. “He put a gun to your head?” she repeated quietly.

Lexa opened her mouth to say that it was fine, that it was nothing, when it hit her with a start that it wasn’t. It wasn’t fine. She didn’t know where this sudden tidal wave of emotions had come from, but they floored her so intensely that for a moment she struggled to breathe. It was Lincoln, as always, who seemed to know that she had talked all she could. And that she needed to be alone.

Lincoln gently grasped Anya’s arm. “Come on, you’re probably exhausted after everything. We’ll be downstairs if you need us.”

Anya turned to him in his grasp as if to argue, but at the stern look on his face she begrudgingly shut her mouth. Instead she turned to her. “Don’t sleep for too long squirt.” She smirked.

Lincoln quickly pushed her forward and Lexa just caught the start of what was bound to be Anya’s replying string of insults when the door to the room suddenly closed and she was alone. Lexa stared forward at nothing for a while before she slowly moved forward to the right side of the room, sitting herself on the edge of her bed. Soon she was shuffling back and sitting in the middle, her knees pulled up and her arms wrapped around them.

She’d been fine. She had been. She didn’t know where this feeling had come from, or why it was there – she’d done the hard part hadn’t she? Someone had held a gun to her head, she had had a split second where she knew she was going to die, had closed her eyes, held her breath, accepted it and prepared for it. But then that moment had never come, and she had been fine.

But she wasn’t fine.

She trained her gaze on her sheets, blue and black striped ones. She almost lurched back in surprise when something was jumping onto her bed. Lexa let out a surprised yelp, but a smile was soon on her face as she saw it was just her cat, Dibbles, the large black cat padding over to her and rubbing its face against her legs. She was quick to give in a hand and Dibbles eagerly brushed her face against it.

Though it was technically the family’s cat, Dibbles was mostly hers. She was the one that changed her litter and fed her most of the time anyway. Though the cat had a sneaky habit of getting food out of everyone by timing who she’d nag. She had been a stray that Lexa had taken an instant liking too. They had had her for nearly three years now, Dibbles was now five years old, and the cat was already purring just from the contact of her hand alone.

“I missed you too buddy,” Lexa whispered. Dibbles pulled back, her paws white as if they were socks on her flawless black fur. “How’d you get in here?”

Dibbles just meowed at her in response, rolling onto her back and showing her stomach to her. Lexa sighed, accepting that she’ll probably never work out her cat’s teleporting abilities, and instead leaned forward and began scratching her belly.

“Mum says I should get help you know. Well, she didn’t say I should. Just that maybe it’s what I need.” Lexa breathed out a shaky breath. “Do you think I need help?”

Dibbles let out a loud purr.

“I thought I was fine but… I don’t… Maybe I’m not. Is that weird? I mean I should be grateful, right? I could have died, but I didn’t, I wasn’t even seriously injured. Well, there was time when the panther had me and was a second from…”

Lexa slowly retracted her hand, instead moving it so scratched under Dibble’s chin. “I didn’t want to die, but there was a point, a second during that night when I hesitated. If Clarke hadn’t of come, I very much doubt I’d be here. And maybe I mean that in more than one sense. She’s… I think she’s given me something, you know? Something to hold on to.”

Dibbles rolled over and pulled herself up so she was sitting. She let out a meow, and Lexa couldn’t help but let out a breathless chuckle at it. After saying the words it did feel like a weight she hadn’t known was there was lifting off her chest. It was strange. She didn’t know when the weight came, when it started pushing down, but with the admittance of the thing she had been ignoring for days now, that weight was shoved off her and it felt she was taking in her first gasp of air after being plunged underwater.

“Shit, maybe _you_ should be a therapist or something. Could have patients rattling off their life story with just a glance.”

Dibbles tilted her head at her and Lexa breathed out a shuddered breath.

“Thanks. I know you’re a cat, but you’re a good one.” Dibbles squinted her eyes at her before she easily leaped off the bed and to the carpeted floor, padding over to what Lexa realised was now a slightly open door. Dibbles shot her a loud meow and Lexa smiled. “What, you play therapist and then I’m required to feed you?”

Dibbles meowed again.

“Fine. Just because you’re cute.”

-

Lexa waited a couple days before she decided it was time to go back for Clarke.

A part of her wanted to immediately turn back the moment she got home, but the other part of her won out. As much as she wanted to, she had missed her family, and disappearing again after quite literally just getting back would do more harm than good. And anyway, Clarke had lived in the woods for over a decade. She could hold out for a couple more days. Lexa couldn’t lie though and say her stomach didn’t twist in unease at the thought. But for some things you just had to grit your teeth.

It was early morning and Anya was still asleep when Lexa got out of bed. She had mastered sneaking out while her sister was sleeping over the years, so with careful steps did Lexa ease herself off her bed and tiptoe to the door to the hallway. She was still in her sleeping clothes and while it may have been boiling when she’d gone to sleep her shirt and shorts did nothing to stop the chilly morning air. But knowing how indecisive the weather was there’d be no point in throwing on a jacket now.

Lexa made her way down the stairs. She was still mindful to keep her steps soft, and once she made it to the bottom and poked her head around the handrail to see Indra in the kitchen talking with someone on the phone she felt the tightness in her chest loosen. Letting out a relieved breath she made her way over to her.

Clarke had told her that she didn’t know where her mother lived, but that her name was Abby Griffin and there was a chance she still lived in somewhere Polis. Since Indra was a captain, Lexa figured that maybe there was a chance she’d know of her. It was a stretch, a big one, but it was all she had. Googling had brought her nothing except that Abby apparently was a senior medical officer at Polis Hospital. If all else failed then Lexa’s plan was to go there with Clarke and manually track her down.

But it would take a lot of effort and Lexa would very much like to avoid that.

Lexa paused by the edge of the kitchen, leaning her shoulder against the bit of extended wall. The living room and kitchen flowed connected, an extended edge that acted as a sort rectangle archway. Indra caught her eye and gave her a nod.

“Okay. Thank you. I’ll talk to you later then. Yes.” Indra glanced briefly to Lexa before turning around and muttering softly. “ _Leidon Gostos._ ”

She brought her phone down and stuffed it into her pocket. Lexa gave her a reassuring smile. Gustus was her boyfriend, a giant of a man who while looking like he could fight a lion and win; he was an absolute teddy bear at heart. She actually quite liked Gustus, but Indra tended to avoid bringing him around or talking to him in front of them, as she knew just how overprotective her family has become. Even if she had been seeing him for nearly three years now, he hadn’t come around all too often.

This was mostly due to Anya. Her sister could only count the people she trusted on one hand, and accepting a new figure on that list was a challenge that few were up to. Gustus was though. Even if Anya constantly scowled at him while he was around, Gustus was quick to smile and even bring her presents.

Lexa shook herself out of her thoughts.

“Morning _nomi_.” Lexa softened her gaze. “How is Gustus?”

Her mother hesitated, but upon seeing Lexa’s relaxed posture her shoulders lost their tension. “He is well. He called to share his relief that you made it home safe.”

Lexa nodded. “You can tell him on my behalf I thank him.”

“Of course.”

Lexa took in a shaky breath, ignoring the sudden nerves in her stomach. “I uh, I actually wanted to ask you something.” Indra remained silent in cue for her to go on. Lexa pushed herself off so she wasn’t leaning anymore. “Do you know anyone named Abby Griffin?”

Her mother let out a long sigh. Lexa frowned at the sound. “Abby Griffin?”

Lexa nodded, pretending she wasn’t holding her breath.

“It has been a while since I’ve heard that name.” Indra let out a chuckle. “That woman is a _skaikrasha_ trapped in a human body I swear.”

Lexa’s eyes widened. “So you know her?”

“I do. I met her, years and years ago.” Indra creased her brow at her. “You were eight I believe. It was… an interesting meeting to say the least.” Her voice trailed off, her eyes losing their focus. She was quiet for a bit before her head suddenly snapped up, seeming to remember where she was. Indra squinted her eyes. “Why do you ask?”

Lexa tried to keep her voice casual. “Oh I was hoping you’d know where she lived. So I could go see her.”

Indra’s gaze changed from relaxed to attentive. She stared at her carefully. “Why?” she questioned.

“I met someone, while I was… gone. I think it was her daughter.”

Lexa had decided last night that she was going to be truthful with her Mum. Not completely mind you, no need to have her thinking her crazy for talking of hybrid angels, but for this she needed her mother’s trust. And even if her mother internally thought her reasons strange she’d support her no matter what.

Indra leaned back slightly, still eyeing her. “A daughter.”

Lexa nodded.

She stared at her for a painful amount of time before eventually dipping her head. Lexa had to force herself to stay upright and not collapse with relief. Indra turned around and headed over to the dining table they had in the corner. On top of it was her laptop, and Lexa watched trying to temper her excitement as she flipped it open and began typing rapidly. Soon she was closing the laptop back down and pulling out a kitchen drawer. She grabbed a sticky note and with a pen wrote down an address.

She handed it to Lexa, but as Lexa’s fingers gripped the note her mother’s other hand came and gently grabbed her wrist.

“Lexa, you should know that I’ve been keeping tabs on Abby for a long time at her request. I do not know her past, but it is not clean, understand?” Indra warned, her gaze so intense Lexa felt like she was searching her very soul.

Lexa still nodded. “I understand.”

“Be careful Lexa.” With a slightly shuddered breath Indra let go of her and took a step back. “Do you need me to drive you?”

“No, it’s alright.” Lexa said shaking her head. Her mother looked like she wanted to argue, so Lexa quickly turned and as subtly as she could ran for the stairs. “I’ll be back before five!” she called over her shoulder.

She sprinted up the stairs to avoid her mother’s reply. Apparently her steps were too loud, because when she got to the top the door to her room was swinging open and a scowling Anya was there looking just seconds from murder. Lexa ducked under her arm before her sister could refuse her access. Ignoring the numerous death threats she got as she rifled through her wardrobe and threw on a quick outfit Lexa slipped out the room and ran down the stairs. Checking that she had everything she opened the front door and stepped outside.

A smile graced her face before she could stop it.

She was finally going to see Clarke.

-

Clarke wasn’t, necessarily, _bored_ , as she sat high on a tree, legs swinging idly over the deep drop below. She had spent hours of her life doing exactly what she was doing right now. Had spent countless nights and days staring out at the unending forest around her, perking her ears for the sounds and if any curious birds flew passed and were looking for conversation. She’d found great entertainment in what she was doing right now. Had for years.

But _fuck_ she was bored.

With all the mayhem that had happened over the past few days and the promise of the new life she was about to enter, all the things that kept her entertained were losing their flare. Well, not completely all. Hunting was still exhilarating as always. Flying so high that the clouds were below her, not above, was still the same amount of joy as always. But even with her ability to talk to animals she was bored. For the first time since she was twelve she was going to be meeting new _people_. Human beings. She was about to enter an entirely new world.

But for now she was stuck waiting in a tree.

Clarke huffed. She glanced down to the ground below. She smiled slightly at the sight of Aden, the blond two and half year old wolf curled tightly at the base of the tree, dozing away. She had explained to him what was happening and even if she had spent the past year with nothing but the company of him, she had still offered of the choice of him to stay in the woods if he wished. In response he had nipped her hand. Even if Clarke had scowled at him for it, internally she was grinning wide that Aden was staying with her.

It had been two days since Lexa had left. Clarke found herself missing the girl. Despite the bad encounters she’d had with humans before, Lexa she learnt was very different. Clarke had never felt before what she felt with Lexa. Such a strange calmness, a relaxing of her soul. She felt at peace in her presence. When around her Clarke would never want her to leave. It was true she’d only known her for a max of four days, but still she found her heart speeding up at the thought of seeing her again.

The sun had risen higher now and so the heat was coming back. She stretched her wings, letting out a pleased sigh when the stiffness evened out. She pulled up a wing so it blocked some of the intense sunrays. Her eyes trailed over the scenery around her lazily. She’d deliberately been hanging around an area that her and Lexa had talked they would meet up in. It was near the camp but a little ways out to avoid the police and curious civilians hanging around the where they’d fought the Mountain Men.

Clarke ignored the bitter taste in her mouth at the thought.

She had a half a mind to maybe just go flying for a while when she heard a rolling of tires on dirt. Clarke straightened, her eyes gaining renewed determination as she scanned the area around her. She was sitting in the one of the last few trees before it was an open clearing and she felt her heart fly into her throat at the sight of a car coming through. When it stopped in the clearing and she saw Lexa get out Clarke grinned wide and eagerly jumped.

She glided briefly before dropping and landing just a few metres from Lexa. Instantly Lexa was lurching back with a yelp, her eyes wide as plates as she stared at the sudden presence of Clarke who was all but smirking at her. Eventually Lexa just let out a disbelieving chuckle.

“Hey,” she breathed.

“Hi.”

They gave each other small smiles before Clarke stepped forward and pulled Lexa into a hug. At first Lexa was still, seeming to try and decide how to hug around her wings, but then she just brought her arms under and melted into the embrace. Clarke held her close, her wings coming around and shielding them like a cocoon without her noticing. She breathed in Lexa’s scent and smiled again. They stayed in that position for a while, their breathing syncing into one, and by the time Clarke was finally pulling out she found any of lingering unease in her body slip away.

Lexa went to say something as they locked eyes but her words caught in her throat when she realised how Clarke’s wings now completely surrounded them. Lexa stared at them with a drop jaw, a small disbelieving smile growing on her lips. Slowly she reached out a slightly trembling hand, her fingers tentatively trailing against her feathers. Clarke couldn’t help but feel her wings twitch with the gentle contact. It was strange, as she’d never felt anyone touch her wings before. Sure, Nethon, one of the wolves who’d raised her, had been curious once or twice and nudged his nose against it – but it was nothing like the way Lexa was doing so now.

Lexa seemed to suddenly to realise where she was again and hastily brought her hand back to her side. Clarke sensed the shift for what it was and withdrew her wings, taking a small step back.

Finally it appeared that Lexa found her words again.

“I’m sorry I didn’t come sooner,” she started. There was guilt that rippled in her eyes. “I would have but, my family, they were so worried and…”

Clarke was already shaking her head. “It was good that you didn’t.” There had been a surprising amount of times when she’d gone missing growing up, and she could remember clear as day the overwhelming excitement and relief her pack would have when she’d finally get home. “I was fine, anyway. A little bored perhaps. But fine.”

The tension in Lexa’s shoulders eased out with a relieved grin. “Thank you.” She said quietly.

Clarke didn’t say anything in response. Just lifted a hand and let her fingers trail gently down Lexa’s arm. That seemed to prove answer enough, but Clarke was especially pleased with the faint red tint to Lexa’s cheeks. Eventually, probably taking longer then it should have as they spent a quiet amount of time just staring at each other, Lexa stepped back and gave her a nod.

“Okay, do you uh, have everything you need?”

Clarke raised a brow. “I have all I need. Oh, hold on.” Ignoring Lexa’s frown she turned her head around, bringing her fingers to her mouth and letting out a sharp whistle. It was true she could have shouted at Aden in trigedasleng to come, but over the year they’d spent together she had learned that whistling was far quicker and easier.

It wasn’t a second later when a blur of blond fur burst out from the trees. At spotting Lexa Aden paused, his legs slowing, before going off in an ecstatic barking spree and sprinting faster than Clarke had seen in a long while. The speed he was going at actually worried Clarke slightly, but she couldn’t do anything as within a blink Aden was there and pouncing for Lexa. Lexa went down with a squeal, laughing in disbelief and glee at the predator on top of her who was just licking her face frantically.

“Hey, hey!” Lexa giggled as she tried to push away Aden’s muzzle. “I missed you too buddy, but you’re drowning me in drool right now.”

Aden let out a giddy bark in response.

Clarke finally decided to intervene. Her grin was so wide her cheeks hurt. “ _Pleni Aden, reik em au,_ ” she reprimanded, and though Aden did give Lexa one last nudge he reluctantly pulled himself away. Lexa grinned as she pulled herself back up to her feet, having to dust off the dirt on her knees. When they locked eyes, Clarke was grinning too. “He missed you. Was quite annoying, actually. When I’d told him to protect you he took that to heart… he’s still a little mad at me that he hasn’t been able to see for these few days.”

Something indescribably soft passed over Lexa’s face and Clarke found that the sight took her breath away.

Still, Clarke managed to quietly whisper, “I missed you.”

That softness came again, but this time it stayed, lingered in her eyes. “I missed you too.”

They got lost in each other’s stares again.

Eventually Aden let out an impatient bark and that seemed to break the spell. With a small sigh Clarke broke her gaze from Lexa’s, shooting Aden a small glare. She heard his resounding response in her head, sassy as always.

‘ _Yu odon chek em au?_ ’

Clarke gave him a scowl in response.

Lexa regained her attention with a soft clearing of her throat. She gave her a shy smile before gesturing behind her at her car. “So… I managed to find where your mother lives, so we can go see her now. That’s uh, that’s my car.” Her brow creased slightly as she stared at something over Clarke’s shoulder. “Your wings they’ll have to…”

Clarke knew what she was asking and gave her nod. Growing and retracting her wings took almost no mental effort on her part now. At first she had had to concentrate with all she had, but now all she had to was wish for them to go and she’d feel that familiar strange warmth trail up her feathers. There was a second where they all seemed to glow before the feathers rolled into themselves and began to disappear, the bone and muscle following soon after. When the wings were gone and the bone of the wings fully sunk into her, giving no evidence that they were ever there apart from two circle scars where the bone would burst through, Clarke gave Lexa’s awe-struck face a smile and headed over to her car.

Soon Lexa was coming over too, seeming to finally grab a hold of herself.

She must have seen how Clarke was staring at the car. She knew what cars were, had been in one matter-of-fact when she was twelve, but that was five years ago and the sight was still strange. Lexa’s car was white and had clearly been used for a while, there was a long cargo tray that was connected with the passenger body, and after staring at the machine for a bit Lexa walked up by her side. Their hands brushed against each other’s.

“It’s a Ute.”

Clarke turned to her with a frown. “Ute?”

“Utility. Like a pickup truck.” At Clarke’s continued stare Lexa’s cheeks flushed. “Which you of course wouldn’t know. It’s basically the same thing. Mostly. Uh anyway,” Lexa shook her head at herself. “Aden can sit up in the back. I’ve brought a collar so we can make sure he’s restrained and safe.”

Clarke stiffened the idea of tying Aden up, but when Lexa gave her a reassuring smile she forced herself to relax.

“Or he can sit with us in the front. Will be a tight fit but we could get away with it.”

Clarke her shook head slightly. “It’s okay. I trust you.”

Lexa didn’t immediately reply, and when Clarke looked over to her she saw Lexa to be staring at with something she couldn’t name in her eye.

Eventually, Lexa just nodded, her throat bobbing, before she went to open the car door and presumably get the restraints.

Aden resists, unsurprisingly, as they try to put on the dog harness. It’s difficult, but in the end he begrudgingly stays still after the fifth time of Clarke growling at him. He easily voiced his many objections but even if he was a wolf he knew not to mess with an angry Clarke. So instead he reluctantly stayed still so they could make him secure. When he was up in the back and ready to go her and Lexa shared a relieved nod for dealing with the teenage wolf, before Lexa, ever chivalrous, came to her side and opened the passenger door for her.

It had been so long since she’d last been in a car and Clarke didn’t bother to hide her amazement as she stared wide eyed at the inside of the car. It felt like a different world, though she supposed it was. It took a little while for her to bring herself back to the reality, blinking away her thoughts and steeling herself, her fingers gingerly wrapping around the seat belt and pulling it down so it clicked in. It was slightly scary how new and alien everything was.

But then Clarke would look over to the girl at side.

And suddenly, it wasn’t so bad.

-

It took a long while for them to get there.

Wherever her mother resided was far out from the woods. Lexa and her didn’t talk much throughout the drive. Not that they didn’t know what to say, but more that, for now, nothing was really needed to be said. They did fall into conversation though, especially when Lexa put her music on via her phone and Clarke’s previously lazy gaze peeked in interest. Lexa had glanced to her with a bemused smile.

“Borrowed Anya’s phone as mine is still fucked. As long as I get it back to her in once piece she won’t kill me.” She paused then before throwing in a shrug. “Well, tell a lie. She’s going to be bitter at me all week. But I've still got leverage for being kidnapped and nearly dying and all, so she won’t say anything.”

Clarke had laughed softly at her. “It sounds like your sister is bitter at you often.”

“Oh Anya’s always bitter. Just varies how much. Really, I think her purpose in life is solely to insult me.”

Clarke shook her head with a smile. “She reminds me of Sasha.”

Lexa had glanced at her then, curiosity making her gaze intense. “Who’s that?”

“She was one of my pack. She was like a sister.” It didn’t hurt like it used to think of her, but there was still this unavoidable twitching of her heart. Clarke still said the words with a smile. “Always sarcastic. Lived off proving me wrong. She was one of the wolves I grew up with, was probably the most closest with. Had blond fur, like Aden”

“How can a wolf be sarcastic?”

“I can talk to animals.” Clarke said simply.

Lexa head had whipped towards her. Clarke was worried for a moment that’d she gotten whiplash. It didn’t stop the smirk from spreading on her lips. “You can talk to _animals?_ ” Lexa exclaimed.

She was staring at her with wide eyes, and with a mischievous smile did Clarke look right back at her. “The road, Lexa.”

Her eyes were instantly snapping back onto said road, hastily slowing down, as she hadn’t realised how her speed had increased. Lexa threw her a glare for her smirk.

Clarke stared pointedly out the window to hide her grin.

Slowly the constant sight of trees, grass and dirt turned into paved black roads, houses and shops and – something Clarke was learning to be seriously annoying – traffic. Still Clarke looked out to the outside world with a hungry gaze, trying to take in much as this new life as she could get. It was probably good that she’d had a few previous experiences with this world, but that was years ago, and it seemed that humanity had evolved and learnt fast. It was incredible really, and for minutes upon minutes of a time would Clarke get lost in the outside sights, only coming back to glance at Lexa. Sometimes she didn’t even have a reason to glance at her. She just did. Just felt a wave of comfort and ease at looking at her and knowing she was with her alone.

Sometimes those glances grow long. Sometimes, she’d stare at Lexa for long gaps of time, feeling at ease to trace her face with her eyes and take note of each individual feature. It was summer, and despite the initially chilly morning the cold didn’t last long. It was back at boiling and because of the heat there were occasional drips of sweat that leaked from her neck. The immense efforts of the air con not quite enough to win over the temperature; in the end they had given up and just opened the windows instead.

She didn’t really know why, but the sight of Lexa driving with one hand and her elbow resting casually against the ledge of the open window; the stubborn hairs flying loose out of her braids as they rolled through the highway; the tank top and shorts, long forgotten flannel tied loosely at her waist—her mouth would grow desert dry.

It took hours, the scenery changing from trees to rural to city to suburbs but finally they were nearing their destination. Slowly Lexa brought the car to a halt, stopping in front of a house that wasn’t small but it also wasn’t massive. It looked well kept, the angles of building slightly modern, but even if the car had stopped and the engine was off, they didn’t immediately move. Lexa looked to her first, her eyes soft. “We’re here, this is address my mum gave. You ready?”

“Yeah.” Her voice must have shook, because Lexa shot her a look. Clarke just gave her a small smile. “I am. I’m just… excited. It’s been… been so long since I’ve seen her.”

Clarke didn’t mention that in all honesty she had never expected she was going to be able to see her again.

Lexa returned her smile before she nodded and got out, Clarke doing the same. They both rounded to the back Clarke smiling when she saw Aden was curled up asleep. She glanced up at Lexa’s surprised chuckle.

“He could sleep through an earthquake if he wanted to,” Clarke commented, and she was glad she did when Lexa laughed again.

Lexa shook her head at him. “You want to wake him up?”

Clarke bobbed her head and reached over the sides of the cargo tray, lightly nudging him. Instantly his eyes were opening and a growl was on his lips, but at seeing nothing but Clarke, the ferociousness was gone and instead he yipped. Remembering what Lexa had done before she leaned forward and undid the lead tying to the wire fence wall. With much more ease than before she and Lexa also took off the harness. His first instinct was to split off and explore the clearly new environment. Clarke let him, as while he did stray away and observe the new place, he made sure to glance back to her regularly to know if she needed him.

Her and Lexa waited a few moments before they started down the path to her mother’s house. Clarke gave Lexa a nervous smile, and Lexa responded by leaning forward and, after pausing to affirm Clarke’s nod, gently pressed her lips up against hers. The kiss was feather light and all too soon Lexa was pulling away. Clarke must have been frowning because Lexa let out a laugh that’d make the heavens jealous of the sound.

“Come on,” she said, still smiling. “If we keep standing here my skin is going to be burnt to hell.”

“I wouldn’t let that happen.”

Lexa raised an amused brow at her. “Yeah? You going to fight the sun for me?”

Clarke rolled her eyes, but still she smiled, feeling like her cheeks were going to start aching from how much she was. “No _branwoda_. I’d take away the burn.”

The green in Lexa’s eyes softened and Clarke was powerless to tear her gaze away.

They started moving again and despite the lightness that always seemed to revolve around Lexa’s presence the rolling was returning to Clarke’s gut. The last time she saw her mother she was twelve, and she wasn’t even quite sure how old she was now, but she knew it had been many years since. It did seem to be habit at least, the way they only had small pieces of time together, glimpses of precious pockets of memories strewn about in patches.

Hopefully she would never have to worry about that again.

The small distance between her and the door of the house suddenly became gigantic, and Clarke felt her stomach clench and her hands curl into fists as the world swayed and it stretched. Logic tried to calm her, tried to shove its way to the front of mind and reassure that this was a _good_ thing, it will be the same as when she had turned up unannounced when she was twelve. Her mother will be shocked, she will be happy, and most importantly Clarke will be loved.

Right?

But now there was fear that was creeping along her skin. Because it had been so long, so, _so_ long, and while there was a persistent ache in her chest because of it, she didn’t know if it’d be the same for her mother. The moment that she got to that door, that it opened and her mother was there, will she still be happy? Or had she missed it? Because it had been _years_ , and she thinks that it was longer than the usual missed gaps of time they shared.

What if her mother had moved on?

She was spiraling, a distant part of her realised that, but it didn’t calm her down in any way. Except just as she felt herself tip over that cliff, teeter right at the edge and hazard a glance down, she felt a brush of warmth at her leg. Her eyes snapped down, and that ever-present unease in her stomach lessened when she saw it was Aden.

He must have sensed her distress. Aden whined softly, nudging his head into her tight fists, and he kept gently bumping into them until they unraveled. With a shaky breath she carefully threaded her fingers through his blond fur and scratched that spot he loved right behind his ear. Like always when she did that he let out a little pleased rumble, and she was powerless to stop her smile.

She didn’t notice they’d gotten to the door until she realised they had stopped walking.

Clarke sucked in a sharp breath. She tightened her grip into Aden’s fur, and it was more instinct than anything that she glanced behind her, her eyes searching for the one other pair that always offered such strange calmness every time. Clarke frowned a little when she saw that Lexa was standing further back from than usual.

Lexa spoke up before she could ask with a soft smile. “It’s alright, I just don’t want to intrude. This is your moment. Not mine.”

But the words only made Clarke’s brow furrow further. “But I want you,” she said. “You are not intruding. I want you here.”

There was a blush that rose to Lexa’s cheeks that had Clarke grinning, but her cheeky smile softened when Lexa did too, and the subtle tension that had been hiding in her shoulders released. With timid steps Lexa approached her, and it was clear that she was moving at a deliberately slow pace in case Clarke changed her mind.

Clarke didn’t.

Lexa was back saddled at her side, and Clarke didn’t understand the contentment that flowed through her because of it. Instead she reached out the hand that wasn’t tangled in Aden’s fur and let it brush against Lexa’s wrist, felt the wonderful jolt that travelled up her arm from the shared contact of skin, and when Clarke smiled Lexa smiled with her.

And that was it. With Lexa with her, Clarke found her strength. So she let go of Aden’s fur, smoothed out the splayed hairs, took a deep breath and raised her fist to the door. Holding her breath, Clarke knocked. She remembered it was James had done, the Mountain Man who had saved her when she was younger, when he had brought her to her mother’s.

There was a beat of heavy silence, one that made her chest constrict. But then her hearing caught the rush of heavy feet, the approaching steps, and not a second later the door was swinging open. Clarke had been wearing a hopeful smile without realising, but when the door opened it instantly dropped.

Because it wasn’t her mother that stood on the other side.

It was a man.

Clarke felt her stomach sink through the ground, and she could only stare as the man looked up and down at her with a small frown. He was about a head taller than her and had a long face, short wavy dark brown hair and a surprisingly warm set of hazel eyes. It was obvious in what he was wearing that he had been working on something, he had a light t-shirt on that looked to be a little damp with sweat.

“Sorry for taking so long,” the man started, and his voice, like his eyes, was oddly gentle. “Was just doing some reno out back. Do you need something?”

Clarke didn’t think her throat was quite cooperating yet, but she managed to return herself. “My mother lives here,” Clarke said; as it was her only hope really. If he corrected her that he lived by himself, then she knew that it was done. But still, there was a small part of her that held on to the hope, because she was _sure_ that she could scent it in the air. There was something familiar about the smell of this place.

The man stiffened, and the crease in his brow grew deeper. He glanced behind him before looking back to her. “That’s not funny, kid.” He muttered, and there was something hard in his voice.

Clarke frowned too, but it was more out of annoyance than anything else. “Why would it be funny?”

He stared at her. It was clear he was trying to see if she was lying, to find if she was joking with him, for some reason. Clarke stared right back, and there were many tense seconds before his shoulders sagged and he let out a long breath. He squinted his eyes at her, looking over his shoulder a second later.

“Abby,” he called, and Clarke felt her entire body freeze. “There’s someone here for you. It’s…” he shook his head. “I don’t know, can you please come and sort this out?”

There was a pause before a voice called back, feminine and so painfully familiar. “I’m busy Marcus! Do you want burnt lunch or no?”

The man, Marcus apparently, rolled his eyes. “This is important. The kid here says she’s your daughter?”

No response.

Then, with a slight shake. “…What?”

“Will you just come over here?” he huffed, and Clarke could barely breathe as she heard the sound of hurried steps. Marcus seemed to step back in instinct so Clarke had a clearer view into the house. It was a wide hallway, and as he stepped back Abby appeared around the corner of it, a glass bowl of something liquid in her hands. The moment their eyes met Abby dropped the bowl and the glass shattered into a floor with an ear ringing _smash_.

Clarke didn’t bother to try and tame her wide relieved grin, and at it Abby brought her hand to her mouth with a gasp.

“I’m home,” Clarke whispered, and her voice shook, her entire body trembled with its restraint. She wanted so bad to sprint and launch into her mother’s arms, but there was a part of her that was still afraid. Still terrified that she’d missed her chance.

Her fears were proven misplaced when a hard sob broke out of Abby’s throat. It was enough to free her from being paralysed it seemed, because not a heartbeat later she was charging forward and Clarke lurched towards her too. Their body’s met into such a crushing hug Clarke was convinced her bones were sure to be broken. She didn’t care though. If broken bones meant that she got to feel how tight her mother held her, was able to bury her nose into her neck and breathe deep, find that scent that she had _known_ she’d smelt before—then broken bones it shall be.

She could hear her mother’s sobs in her ear, as she muttered over and over again her name, so much like when she was eight and she’d seen her at the police station. Abby embraced her tight enough to cut off her breathing and Clarke held her just as tight, cried just as hard.

“I’m home,” Clarke breathed again, with such gentleness that only her mother could hear. Somehow Abby’s grip impossibly tightened. “I’m home.” Clarke repeated, even softer, the ends of her words cracking and tears dampening her mother’s shoulder. Clarke screwed her eyes shut to stop them.

She couldn’t quite tell how long it was until they separated. Time was such an unreadable thing, and the moment both felt like it lasted for a thousand ages and a single span of a breath at the exact same time. All she knew was that when they _did_ pull away, her mother’s grip didn’t move off her, just adjusted, just gently pushed her at arm’s length and grasped tightly to her shoulders. When their sights met Abby’s face broke into a blinding grin, and Clarke’s easily matched it.

“You’re home.” She whispered.

Clarke leant forward so their foreheads touched, brought up her arms around Abby in the way she’d hold her pack mates, draped them over their shoulders.

And finally, she felt her heart settle.

 _Home_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i do want to put out a quick apology for how long this took to come out. usual writer's excuse of life getting in the way, losing motivation, getting sucked into other stories etc. also i was INTENDING to finish this by july, as i had about 15k by then, but then i just... lost all motivation. so if you notice the dodgy quality it's bc 3/4 of this shit was done months ago. would also like to throw in a sorry for the generally low quality, i really have no idea how to write straight (gay) fluff with little drama and i ask that you give me some patience as im trying my best but.. i will make mistakes and shit so, you know, please just be kind. there's a person behind every username and all that.  
> quick side note: I’ve changed the series name to ‘Fallen’ as I’ve never felt like 'I’m Not At Afraid I’m Terrified' quite got across what I wanted. So, just clarifying that it’s still the same series, just a different name. 
> 
> (part 2 is already written so it should be up soon)
> 
> Translations! (so many goddamn translations)  
> Ai hod yu in sis - I love you sister  
> Ai hod you in seintaim, bro. - I love you too, brother.  
> Ai shanen yu laik klir - I’m happy you’re safe  
> Ai seintaim - Me too  
> Strikon, monin hou - Little one, welcome home  
> Yongon - Child.  
> Nomon - Mother  
> Nomi - Mum  
> Hodnes - Love  
> Leidon Gostos - Goodbye Gustus  
> Skaikrasha - Storm  
> Pleni Aden, reik em au - Enough Aden, let her go  
> Yu odon chek em au? - You done checking her out?  
> Branwoda - Fool


	2. Darling Your Laugh (Part 2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the kind comments last chapter. It really means so much to me, so seriously, just thank you. Here’s part 2, I hope you enjoy!  
> (for that Full Immersion listen to: I Don’t Know by Peter and Kerry (acoustic version))

Eventually she was led into a living room.

They were sat around together now, on couches and chairs, Aden lying on a rug pressed up against her leg, though Clarke noticed Lexa had opted to stand. Clarke would have much preferred her seated beside her, but they seemed to come to a wordless compromise within a glance, where Clarke sat at the edge of the couch and Lexa stood right next to it, so their shoulders were just close enough to touch. Her mother sat beside her, some piece of contact always being shared. Either in a hand at her shoulder or entwined with her own, their arms touching, there was always _something_ , a proof of connection.

Proof that it was real.

Clarke felt similarly to her mother and eagerly leaned into the contact too.

The man who had opened the door sat in an armchair to the side of Abby, and Clarke caught how his eyes kept flicking between the two of them, her and her mother, and she could see it as he pieced it together. The similar features they shared, the sheer relief and love and _happiness_ that burned so brightly from Abby’s eyes. It was abundantly clear of what they were to each other. That Abby’s daughter had truly come home.

Silence was thick around the room, but Clarke couldn’t decide if it was tense or not. At hearing a shaky intake of breath beside her, Clarke turned her gaze to her mother, watching as she prepared herself to speak. “So,” Abby offered her a shaky smile, bringing her hand that was tangled with Clarke’s own into her lap, using her other to cover their joined grip. “You… you came home.”

Clarke nodded.

Abby looked like she was going to cry again but seemed to manage to control it. “You must know that I don’t say this because I don’t want you here or that I’m not glad that you are, because I _am,_ I am so, _so_ happy you are here.” Abby let out a wet chuckle and Clarke smiled with her. Relief eased the nausea in her gut. “But… you’ve… you’ve been away all these years for a reason. It’s not safe, and—‘

“It is,” Clarke interrupted, and she gripped their joined hands tight in reassurance. She glanced behind her at Lexa, reaching out a hand and gently squeezing Lexa’s arm. “Lexa saved me.”

At that Lexa’s eyes went wide, her jaw dropping as all eyes turned to her. “I really didn’t,” she chuckled awkwardly and Clarke rolled her eyes. She squeezed Lexa’s arm again, a little tighter, with a little more affection, before she reluctantly let go and turned back to face her mother.

“She did.” Clarke grinned, though it was full of such warmth and pride it was a wonder the room itself didn’t light up with the sheer brightness of it. “They are gone. _He_ is gone. I am safe.”

Abby blinked at her, her gaze bouncing between her and Lexa. “I… saw on the news of the attack from them, how they’d put Cage away but I didn’t think it was… there was no way it _could_ be real, I thought it was fake or I was hoping or…”

Clarke just shook her head at her slowly. “I am safe.”

“Not entirely.” Abby countered, and there was such sadness to her voice, like it physically pained her to say it. “You never will be. But… but with Cage gone, there will be very little focus on you, _he_ was the one obsessed with you. If he’s, truly, gone from our lives then…” she laughed then, and it was bright with relieved disbelief. “Then you do not need to hide so utterly anymore.”

Her mother gave her a look, and at the sight of the brimming tears Clarke leant forward and hugged her again. She felt her mother melt into her, felt the long breath of relief brush against her ear. “Safe.” Clarke murmured into her hair.

They pulled back only at the sound of Lexa clearing her throat. Abby held her at shoulder length again, frowning a little over her side at Lexa. Clarke turned her head behind her to look to her, seeing the tension in her shoulders.

“I uh, I really should go, so,” she shot the room a strained smile, but when it reached Clarke it softened. “Thank you for allowing me into your home. I’ll… I’ll leave you two alone to catch up.”

Lexa was already stepping back and instantly Clarke was standing up, except she found a sudden hand at her shoulder. When Clarke looked behind she saw it was her mother, staring out at Lexa. “Lexa, wait,” she called, and though Clarke noticed how Lexa stiffened, she stopped moving and faced her. Abby offered Lexa a sincere smile and it made Clarke’s chest feel warm knowing she liked Lexa. “You forgot something.”

Lexa frowned. “What have I…?”

Her answer came in Abby coming forward and pulling her into a tight hug.

It made Clarke grin to see Lexa’s surprise, how for a moment she was shock still, until, albeit with a bit of awkwardness, she returned the unexpected embrace. “You saved her,” Clarke heard Abby mutter, and was unsurprised to see Lexa almost instantly shaking her head, trying to pull away, but Abby just held her tighter. “You brought my daughter home.” Abby said, and this time, Lexa didn’t have an argument at the ready, and her body deflated.

“It was Clarke who saved me.” Lexa murmured, and Clarke knew it was something she probably shouldn’t have heard, but Lexa’s eyes drifted over to her as she said it. Pierced into her own.

Their shared gaze didn’t break till Abby pulled away.

“I’ll always be grateful to you Lexa,” Abby promised, her hand squeezing Lexa’s shoulder. Clarke could see that it was starting to get to Lexa, because she was blinking, and all of sudden she couldn’t meet anyone’s gaze and stepped back. Clarke figured that maybe she shouldn’t be scrutinising the interaction so intently anymore and decided to give Lexa some space. She turned around and instead let her gaze trail around the living room they were in with a proper sweep, her hearing still catching glimpses of words like ‘phone number’ and ‘stay in contact’.

Eventually her sight fell onto the only person in the room she didn’t know. She wasn’t too surprised to find that he wasn’t watching Lexa and mother and instead his gaze was solely on her. It wasn’t harsh, seemed to be more in awe than anything, and though there _was_ a soft gentleness in his eyes, Clarke still didn’t know him. So she was apprehensive. She watched him carefully, the way he sat, the way he stared at her. Aden seemed to pick up on her sudden appraisal of him because she saw him shift in the corner of her eye. He picked himself up and cautiously approached Marcus, sniffing his shoes carefully.

Before Clarke could say anything she heard the shuffle of feet behind her and realised that Lexa was leaving. Her attention was quick to fall away from the stranger and to chase after Lexa, quickly slipping past her mother and towards the hallway. When she made her way through she saw Lexa was just reaching for the door.

Clarke launched forward and sudden thud of feet must have been enough to alert Lexa of her presence, for her to turn around and drop her jaw at her. Clarke didn’t hesitate to crash into her and pull her into an airtight embrace. Unlike the hug she had shared with her mother, Clarke felt Lexa relax into her instantly, wrapping her arms around and nuzzling her nose into her hair. Clarke let out a sigh of relief. It was unexplainable how she felt her entire _soul_ relax whenever she embraced Lexa.

“Will you come back?” Clarke whispered into her neck, trying to keep her voice steady.

It still shook.

She felt Lexa squeeze her tighter before leaning out, only far enough so that their foreheads could touch, those jaded green eyes flicking between her own. “Of course,” Lexa muttered, and there was a confused but warm smile that spread on her lips. “I’m leaving for now. But I’m not leaving _you_.”

Clarke was used to people leaving, so she took great care to analyse Lexa’s voice, to try and figure if she was lying, if it was an empty promise. But there was nothing but sincerity, and so Clarke found an answering smile on her lips too. Lexa’s grew at the sight at it and Clarke was completely powerless to resist the pull it gave. She leant forward and pressed her lips against Lexa’s, felt the flutter in her ribs, but she was pulling away all too soon.

“Okay.” Clarke murmured, and Lexa gave her one last grin, one last peck to her lips, before she stepped back and theirs arms dropped from around each other. She threw her a lingering glance as she opened her door, her eyes drilling into Clarke’s own, and only once Clarke nodded to her did she see the stiffness ease from her shoulders and she slipped out the door.

Clarke remained still for a few long moments. She pulled in a deep breath, felt it slip into her nose and out her mouth, felt the tightness in her chest ease with it, and it was with one last glance to the door and what she’d imagine to be Lexa’s retreating form that she turned around and headed back into the living room. She was careful to sidestep the still smashed glass on the floor.

When she entered back into the living room she saw that Abby had been pacing, but at seeing her, her entire body relaxed and she gave her a smile that Clarke returned. Aden noticed her return too, and the wolf eagerly jumped up from where he’d been sitting by on his haunches, eyes not moving off Marcus in the chair, barreling over to her and winding his way through her legs. Clarke let out a delighted laugh and playfully kicked him away.

“ _Brandwoda,_ ” she insulted playfully, and in response he nipped her hand.

“Is that the same wolf that was with you before?” Abby asked, grabbing Clarke’s attention. Clarke felt her smile fall away a bit. She subconsciously let her fingers glide over Aden’s fur.

“No,” Clarke answered softly. Her gaze flicked to Aden who was now sitting next to her, tongue lolling out of his mouth and grinning up at her. “No, she is gone now. This is Aden.”

Her and Abby shared sad smile and it made Clarke’s heart ache in a good way.

The moment was interrupted with Marcus, who finally stood up. “May I ask how you’ve acquired a wolf as a pet?”

Clarke lost her smile and narrowed her eyes at him. “A wolf cannot be a pet.” She muttered. “He is family.”

Either Marcus didn’t notice her hostility or chose to ignore it. He gave her a gentle smile, raising his hands in surrender. “Of course. My apologies for assuming.”

Clarke’s shoulders relaxed fractionally.

There was tension in the air as quiet crept in, pressing onto lungs, and it was Marcus who sighed and shot everyone a smile. “Well, I’ll leave you two girls to talk. Abby…” he and Abby shared a glance that seemed to hold an entire conversation. “We will… talk after?”

Abby nodded, and after hesitating for just a second, her gaze flicking to Clarke, she leant forward and kissed his cheek. “Would it be alright for you to clean the mess in the hallway?” her voice turned sheepish. “I… it was accident but—“

“I’ve got it.” Marcus assured. They traded smiles before he pulled away from her. Just when he was about to leave the room he lingered by the open doorway, and Clarke found herself meeting his gaze. “It has been wonderful to meet you Clarke.” He bit his lip. “It would be great to have the chance to get to know you. Once you’ve settled in, of course.”

Clarke simply stared at him. But there was a warmth to him, a warmth to his soul, and despite her wariness and his apparent closeness with her mother, she gave in and offered him a stiff nod.

There was relief that blossomed on his features just as he finally slipped out the room.

She felt her mother come up behind her, so she didn’t jump when a hand was suddenly gently squeezing her shoulder. “Come,” she murmured softly. “There’s something I want to show you.”

Clarke nodded at her and followed when she led her out of the room. Aden’s claws clicked against the hardwood floors as they walked across. Abby guided her over to a set of sleek black stairs, and Clarke shot a quick glance to Aden, her lips quirking at the sight of him tilting his head at the stairs curiously, before she simply continued forward and followed her mother up. She gripped the banister, as it seemed as if the stairs were floating and it was incredibly strange walking up.

They reached the top to a hallway, narrower and longer than the one at the front door. There were doors lined on either side of the white walls and Clarke followed curiously as Abby passed nearly all of them, only stopping when they’d reached the very end. She noticed that at the end there was a photo hung up on the wall, and when Clarke furrowed her brow slightly and inched closer she realised she recognised the man in the picture.

She lifted a trembling hand; let it gently glide across the glass of the photo. Her fingers traced the outline of the man’s face, the wide smile and the happiness that seemed to radiate out of the still image.

“That was just after our wedding day.” Abby spoke from behind her, and Clarke let herself smile, trying to imagine how he had felt, how it must have been.

Clarke stared with a certain longing that twisted knots into her chest at the photo of her father, and it was only once she felt Aden brush against her leg did she pull away.

She noticed Abby was standing in front of a door, the wood of it warmer, creamier than that of the walls. She watched as Abby heaved in a slightly shaky breath, pushed her shoulders back and reached down to open the door. As it swung open, Clarke stepped in without preamble, her curiosity as always getting the better of her.

The room wasn’t too big. The walls were closer in than anything she had experienced in years and for a moment she felt the world lean in, her breath get tangled in her throat, but she forced herself to relax, to not let her get taken away with herself. Clarke didn’t know what she was expecting, but she was a little surprised to find the room to be nothing more than a bedroom. A barren one too, by the looks of it, there was a large window at one side that let the afternoon light pour in, the sun sinking into the soft carpet below. Apart from the closet built into the wall and an empty desk wedged near the corner, there was nothing captivating about it.

Clarke stood in the centre of the room and she spun around to face her mother to question her why she had brought her here, when Aden slipped past her feet and jumped up onto the bed, and secretly Clarke delighted at his surprise and confusion at the unexpected texture of the mattress.

“When we got this house, Marcus and I, I told them that we had to get one that could offer a guest bedroom. He’d ask why, and I always told them that it was because in every other place I’d lived, I always had a guest bedroom.” Abby let out a breathless chuckle and Clarke tilted her head at her. “But uh… though I wasn’t _technically_ lying, because I have always had an extra bedroom, that wasn’t the reason that I made sure. That I always make sure I have one.”

Abby stepped forward, but she didn’t reach for her like Clarke expected and instead drifted over to the bed, let her fingers glide over the pale blue sheets. It hit Clarke suddenly how they were similar to the shade of blue in her own eyes. “I didn’t tell him the real reason.” Abby continued, and briefly she paused by Aden who was still lying on the bed. Timidly, she reached out a hand, and Aden only hesitated momentarily before leaning forward and bumping his nose with it. Abby grew a faint smile. “The real reason is because I always held hope that one day you would come back.”

Clarke blinked, her jaw dropping slightly. She felt her heart constrict in her chest.

Abby ran her fingers through Aden’s fur, scratched just under his chin, and when her eyes finally turned to meet Clarke’s she pulled her hand away. “If you want it, because I don’t know… I don’t know what home is for you, but, if you want, then, well, _this_ can be home. Your room,” Abby added, gesturing around them. “But I don’t want you to feel like you _have_ to, I-I don’t know if you still have that pack or—“

“My room?” Clarke whispered softly.

Abby sucked in a shaky breath and Clarke thought it was to stop herself from rambling again. “Yeah, do you know what I mean by that?”

Even if it was clear she was trying to keep the hope from entering her voice, Clarke still heard it.

In reply Clarke simply nodded, and she felt warmth bloom in her chest, felt her heart and mind and _soul_ finally breathe, finally accept. Because she was wrong. Her mother had never given up on her, not ever. Even if she had clearly gone on with life, she had never forgotten her, had always kept a room just for _her_.

The realisation was so relieving that Clarke almost cried.

She glanced around the room as she stepped forward. “It is empty,” she stated quietly. “The walls, they are pale, is it—“

“We can change them.” Abby cut off, bursting towards her. “All of it. None of it. Anything, anything you want.”

Clarke finally let free the blinding grin she had been biting back. “My room?”

Abby’s smile outshined the very stars. “Your room,” she breathed, and it wasn’t a second later that both of them seemed to lose their restraint and Abby pulled her into another crushing hug.

Clarke held her with equal tightness, equal relief and _joy_.

After all these years, after everything, she was home.

She was finally home.

-

It had been a few days since Clarke had been back.

Lexa had to restrain herself from visiting her everyday. Sure, she’d only been back for a total of three, but the effort that she had to take to force herself to sit still and not just spend every waking second spend with the girl was surprisingly hard. She managed to though. Barely. Lexa was excited, as today she was going to be able to see Clarke again. Even better, she was going to be taking her out.

They were going shopping.

Abby had called. Clarke didn’t have a phone, that was something Abby said she’d fix up soon, but she had asked her if she could accompany and help Clarke out for getting clothes and basic supplies for herself. Lexa had immediately said yes, as even if there were nerves in her stomach at the possible catastrophe that was Clarke in a shopping centre, she had enough faith it’d go alright. And Lexa had been needing to get some stationary anyway. Sure, it’ll probably get nicked within the first week, but it’s the false sense of productivity that counts.

So, here Lexa was. Standing in front of Target with Clarke next to her with wide eyes.

Since they couldn’t be walking through the centre with Clarke dressed in her gear that was worn beyond belief and very much gave away her status as an outsider, Lexa had leant her some of her clothes till she got her own. In theory, this would have been fine. But now here Clarke was next to her with _her_ hoodie and _her_ jeans and Lexa was trying with every ounce of will power she had not to just pin her down and kiss her from sunset to daybreak.

Because this was a public space, so she couldn’t do that.

Fucking social etiquette.

“You ready?” Lexa asked, turning her head towards her.

Clarke had still been staring at the sheer amount of people around her but with Lexa’s voice she met her gaze. “Yeah,” they shared a smile. “There’s so many… so many people.”

Lexa’s smile grew. “This is nothing. You should go to a stadium for a finals game, _that’s_ a lot of people.”

“If it’s with you, I’ll go.”

Lexa laughed and shook her head at her. Her gaze turned away just in time to miss Clarke’s slight frown. She took the first step forward, and, with only a little bit of hesitancy, Clarke moved forward to and fell into step beside her. Their hands kept nudging each other’s as they walked through the entrance of the store and with an internal _fuck it_ Lexa just reached out and entwined their fingers.

Clarke squeezed their joined hands tightly in response, and the smile she gave was bright enough to outshine the universe. Sadly though soon she had to let go to reach into her pocket.

Lexa had made a list. She was nothing if but efficient. They were going in for the basics, and since Abby had given Clarke her credit card—with only a sight amount of cautiousness—and had been saving for years, money was no object. To a certain extent. Alas, she could _not_ go home with an unending supply of candles, even if her heart desired it. For Clarke, of course. Not for her.

Maybe one candle?

“What do you feel like getting first?” Lexa asked. She had said the question without looking, instead straightening out her paper and easing through the crinkles. At the responding silence Lexa aimed her head to the side, her eyes bulging when Clarke wasn’t there. It had been literally three seconds how in the fuck had she already lost her? “Clarke!”

She spun around hastily at the sight of a bobbing head of yellow disappearing to an aisle. With a growl to herself Lexa quickly hurried after her, sliding to a halt on the polished floors at the wonderful sight of a completely nonplussed Clarke, curiously walking through the shoe section. Sighing Lexa went to catch up to her. If her steps resembled more stomps than gentle, well, it wasn’t her fault. But when Lexa got close enough to her to see the pure curiosity and amazement at the world around her she found that her frustration flooded out of her in a blink. There was no way her anger could stay with her at the innocence that was Clarke right now.

Lexa stuffed the list into her back pocket. Clearly it wasn’t going to be used.

“You see something you like?”

Clarke nodded absently, reaching out a hand and letting her fingers cautiously touch the shoes in front of them. They were in the runners section. She played with the strings. “I’ve never seen shoes like these before.” She said quietly. Her brows furrowed. “They are they so small.”

Lexa couldn’t help but smile slightly at Clarke’s confused curiosity. “What would you normally have?”

“Had to be heavy. Thick. Too dangerous to ever wear something so… thin,” to prove her point she ran her finger along the side of one of the shoes, pushing just the slightest so the fabric caved. “It is easy for nature to turn on you in the woods. One wrong move and you’re gone.”

Lexa didn’t really know what to say, so instead she walked up so she was next to her again, their arms brushing. “Do you want try some of them on?”

“You can do that?”

Lexa laughed gently. “Of course. Why would you think you couldn’t?”

“I’ve had some… experience, with ‘testing’ products before.” Clarke answered. She failed to hide her sheepish grin. “It didn’t exactly go too well.”

“What did you do?” Lexa asked, trying and failing to hide her amused smile. Clarke locked sights with her and Lexa briefly wondered how when they did her gaze always felt so unexplainably intense.

But soon Clarke was smiling too. “Stole some apples when I was little. Owner wasn’t too pleased.”

“So you’ve always caused trouble then?”

Clarke bumped her shoulder with hers in reply.

Lexa let her mind wander as Clarke explored a few more of the shoe aisles. She wasn’t exactly the best at fashion and normally always went for practicality over style. That being said, she did have her leather jacket that Gustus had gotten for her on her birthday. Now _that_ thing was stylish and had quickly become one of her favourite possessions. Indra had been especially pleased. Still, she followed Clarke as they explored, offered her opinion when needed. She may not be the world’s best fashionista, but she wasn’t blind.

Eventually Clarke found a pair that had caught her eye. They were a simple pair of black vans and with careful fingers did she reached forward and pick them up. For a moment she was still, eyeing the shoes in her hand as she bit her lip. Ignoring what the sight of Clarke biting her lip did to her Lexa rested her hand against the shoe.

“You can try them on, I promise you won’t get in trouble.” Lexa pulled in a small breath. “They’re practically the same to your usual, just more finicky. Pull on the back as you do so it doesn’t get trapped under your heel.”

Clarke nodded and did as Lexa said. Lexa didn’t quite know how to feel about guiding Clarke through something like this. It was something so small, so unnoticeable that pointing it out would harshly remind of just how _different_ Clarke was. Not at all in a bad way, she liked Clarke for who she was, but it didn’t take away the fact that no one had been there the majority of her life to teach her these things. Or even just for her to work it out on her own. She never had that. She never _will_ have that, she’d missed out.

And really it just made Lexa so incredibly sad.

Because Clarke was amazing. She was honest and she was beautiful, both in soul and appearance. By nature it seemed like she wanted nothing more than to help, to aid, to save. Clarke had saved her life, more than once, and both times it was done without the assumption of repayment. On top of that, the first time she had never even met the girl. She had just saved her like it was nothing. It made Lexa happy that despite all the shit life had thrown at her Clarke had come out the other end holding on to who she was.

She was going to repay her back for what Clarke had done for her. Lexa promised herself this. Whether it was through shopping or teaching her social expectations or whatever, she was going to give Clarke all she had to make her feel like she belonged. In Lexa’s personal opinion Clarke deserved far more than her, far more than the _universe_ even.

But for now, just helping her and guiding her will do.

Clarke’s shoe was now on and at seeing the loose laces and clearly having no idea how to tie them shoe looked up to Lexa. Lexa, really trying to suppress the urge to kiss her since their faces were so painfully close, bobbed her head. Instead she picked up the shoelaces with her fingers, making sure Clarke was watching. Deliberately slowly Lexa went through the steps of tying the lace. She mumbled a couple instructions as well to help Clare follow. When she was done she gestured for Clarke to switch legs and tie her other one.

Clarke did it perfectly and Lexa couldn’t help but beam proudly.

“Look at you. All grown up.”

Clarke smiled widely at the pride in her voice.

The rest of the shopping remained pretty uneventful. They spent another hour or so in Target before leaving with full bags and exploring other shops. Clarke had a good eye, apparently, and more than once did Lexa find herself staring at her and trying desperately not to look like a creep. The only slight hiccup was when they’d first gone looking through tops and after finding one Clarke liked Lexa had told her to grab it so she could try it on. That would have been fine, except Clarke had taken her literally and was already halfway through pulling off her hoodie before Lexa had latched onto her arms with wide eyes.

“Not _here_!” she had whispered harshly. Pulling the hoodie back down Clarke had frowned at her.

“Why not?”

“You go to a changing room. Like, a separate place. Where people _can’t_ see you undressing yourself.” Lexa explained, heaving a sigh of relief when Clarke begrudgingly straightened down her hoodie, thankfully not taking it off.

It didn’t stop her from muttering, “you human’s and your ‘dignity’” though, and if Clarke saw Lexa’s suppressed smile she didn’t mention it.

They had finished just about all of their shopping now, thank above, and currently they were strolling through the food court, trying to decide what to get. Lexa had never really been a picky eater and was fine with whatever Clarke chose, but all Clarke was doing was jumping from vender to vender seemingly unable to decide when there was so much choice.

“How can you decide with so many options?” Clarke eventually huffed exasperated. Lexa chuckled.

“You, quite literally, go with your gut. Don’t listen to your head. What are you craving?”

Clarke just shook her head, staring around the food court again. “I don’t even know what half these foods are,” she said quietly. Lexa wasn’t a fool and could tell Clarke was getting overwhelmed.

Glancing around Lexa lifted up a shopping bag filled hand and stretched out a finger. “How about that one? They do schnitzel wraps and such. Really good.”

“What’s schnitzel?”

“Type of meat that’s covered in breadcrumbs and fried. Normally I have chicken, but you can beef or pork or even eggplant.” Just the thought alone had her stomach grumbling. She hadn’t realised how hungry she’d gotten, or maybe she had just ignored it. “You alright with that?”

Clarke gave her a nod and Lexa smiled in return.

She ordered their food, beyond grateful to finally find a free table and collapse. She may go to the gym and do martial arts but fuck was she glad to relinquish hold of the honestly ridiculous amount of shopping bags in her hand. Lexa was carrying more than Clarke and though Clarke had offered again and again to help even the load Lexa’s stupid pride had made her decline. Fucking pride.

Soon they got their food and ate in companionable silence. Lexa broke it once or twice at the amusement that was watching Clarke eat and discover a whole range of flavours she didn’t know existed. They shared small stories and Lexa was pleased to learn more of Clarke’s past and some of the shenanigans she had found herself in thanks to her curious nature. The wolf she had talked about before, Sasha, seemed to be a constant companion in those tales, either as the instigator or the accomplice. There were also a couple tales about Aden, and when that topic had come up Lexa had noticed the way Clarke’s eyes had flickered to the side, as if in a subconscious check that Aden was there.

When Clarke’s face had fallen slightly at remembering he had had to wait in the car, Lexa slipped her hand under the table and gripped hers, and even if the difference was small, it was enough that the light was back in Clarke’s eye.

It was getting late and the time had come to call it a day. Grabbing their rubbish and putting it in the trash Lexa picked her bags—again cursing her stupid pride—and with Clarke doing the same they began the trek back to the car park. They didn’t talk much as the walked, seemingly content with the silence. Their shoulders bumped against each other’s more than once. At more than one point Lexa thought that she should bring up the inevitable conversation of their relationship. More accurately being what they were. But they couldn’t have a talk like that in a space like this, so instead Lexa kept quiet and simply walked beside Clarke.

As they were about to the hit escalators Lexa was pulled to a sudden stop with a jump as she heard her name shouted at her loud enough to gather everyone’s attention in a thirty-mile radius. Spinning around and trying to even the pounding of her heart, she felt relief flush through her at finding the cause of the shout to be none other than Raven. The bronze skinned girl grinned wide, and even though she had her brace on her leg it didn’t stop her from running towards her. She wasn’t alone either, Octavia was beside her, not running but striding with a smile. Lexa couldn’t help but grin as Raven pulled to a stop in front of her, for a second she made a move as if to pull her into hug, but though she paused in the end she went against.

Even if Raven had been a right pain in her ass over the years, she shook her head and pulled her into a quick hug.

Raven was clearly surprised but still she hugged her back. When Lexa pulled away and saw how genuinely pleased Raven was at the show of affection Lexa let herself wonder if it had been right to think love as weakness for so long. She was pulled out of thoughts at Raven shaking her head and clicking her tongue.

“Well shit, and here I thought I’d never see you again.” Her words were playful as always, but there was a warmth of something that Lexa had very rarely heard from the girl.

“It’s good to see you too Raven.” Lexa said seriously. She had learnt a long while ago to read through her sarcasm. “And you too Octavia. How’s your arm?”

When the panther had attack the camp at their trip Octavia had come bursting out the trees with blood seething out of her arm. Lexa could see now that though her arm was bandaged it wasn’t in a cast.

“Painful as shit, but nothing too serious.” Her sight slid to the side of her. “I see you’re not alone.”

Lexa felt slight guilt at somehow forgetting Clarke was there, but when she turned to apologise Clarke was already subtly shaking her head at her, seeming to understand.

“Yes, who _is_ this beautiful lady you’ve got with you Woods?” Raven turned to Clarke with a smirk. She pointed to the side of her before sticking out her hand. “That’s Octavia, and I’m Raven. Lexa’s here best mate.”

Clarke turned her head to Lexa and narrowed her eyes. “Mate?”

“Friend!” Lexa blurted. Her cheeks flushed even if she tried to stop it. She got raised eyebrows from both Raven and Octavia, though Raven’s morphed into a frown when Clarke still hadn’t taken her hand. Clarke was just staring at it in confusion. Trying to keep her voice at a whisper she muttered quietly, “grip her hand and shake it.” Somehow Clarke had heard her and with only slight amount of hesitancy did she reach out and shake Raven’s hand. When Raven let out a smile at the action Lexa heaved a quiet breath of relief.

“And you are…?” Raven asked, seemingly waiting on an answer.

“Clarke.” She paused before adding, “Clarke Griffin.”

“Well Clarke, Clarke Griffin. Just how have you found yourself with the company of lovely Lexa here?” Raven gave Lexa a smirk that told her _exactly_ what her suspicions were. The worst part was the bastard was technically right.

Still, Clarke hesitated, and it suddenly struck Lexa how they hadn’t yet talked out her story she was going to tell everyone. Lexa spoke up for her. “I met her at the police station when I was taken back after the whole… thing there in the forest.” It was the first thing that had come to her mind. “We… got to talking and uh, decided to hang out.”

Oh god that was bad. It must have been because Raven’s smirk was now a full-blown grin. Even Octavia looked the same. Fuck she was _not_ going to live this down.

Raven raised a brow at Clarke. “Trouble maker huh?”

“Only if you get caught.” Clarke easily replied. Raven looked impressed, her eyes flicking between the two of them. Eventually she broke the tension with that same damn grin.

“I like her. Good job Woods. Who knew you could be social.”

Before Lexa could get in some type of retort in reply Octavia was interrupting. “Seriously, it was good meeting you. We’re glad you’re okay Lexa. Though next time a call would be nice to know you’re back.”

“Of course, yeah I’m sorry I’ve… a lot’s been on my mind I—“

“You’re alright Woods, it’s understandable.” Raven said, cutting her off. Her eyes lost some of their mischief and softened. “It’s good to see you back.” The look disappeared fast, as it always was with Raven, being serious was a topic visited only when necessary. “Anywho, I’ve got shit to do. So,” she gave Clarke a wink. “It was nice meeting you Clarke, I’m sure you’ll find a great… _friendship_ with Lexa here.”

Raven must have seen the look of murder on Lexa’s face and decided she’d poked the bear long enough, promptly spinning on her heel and strutting away. Octavia at least was a little politer and gave them both a smile before following on after Raven. Lexa watched them and waited till they were out of earshot before she sighed and let her shoulders slump. She shook her head at herself.

“Well. I suppose that could’ve gone much worse.”

“They seemed nice,” Clarke offered.

Lexa snorted. “Now they do. That was Raven on her best behaviour. You just wait until you actually get close with them, then you’ll know how very _not_ nice they are.”

When Lexa didn’t get an immediate response she turned to look at Clarke, surprised to find her staring at her with an expression so soft that it damn near took Lexa’s breath away. She swallowed dryly. “What?” she whispered.

“You think I’ll get close with them?” Clarke muttered quietly.

Lexa couldn’t help but frown slightly. “Of course. Why wouldn’t you?”

“I just…” Clarke briefly closed her eyes, forcing out a breath before she locked sights with her again. Her eyes were so blue Lexa found she quickly becoming lost in their depths. “Thank you. For helping me, for… giving me something you didn’t have to give.”

“You deserve far more than you’ve been given Clarke.” Lexa answered softly.

Clarke gave her a small smile.

Lexa hadn’t seen anything more beautiful.

-

The drive back home was quiet.

Lexa didn’t mind, and it was with a comfortable silence that she pulled up into the familiar streets. The car rolled to a slow stop, and when Lexa pulled the handbrake and fell back into her seat, letting out a small sigh, she glanced over to her side and smiled a little at the sight of Clarke sleeping. Her head was limp against the headrest, leaning slightly into the window. Lexa indulged herself with a few moments of staring, tracing the shape of her jaw with her eyes and just barely holding down on the desire to reach and run her lips over them.

Instead she pushed a long breath out of her nose and opened the car door.

She decided to give Clarke a few extra minutes of sleep as she wasn’t blind that while their shopping had been fun, it had been different and draining too, so she let her rest and walked around the back to free up Aden. Unlike his companion he was awake and at seeing her barked excitedly, his paws scrambling from under him in haste to jump up.

“Shush!” Lexa hissed in a whisper, her hands shooting out and grabbing onto his ruff to keep him still. She saw him pull his lips into a snarl and raised a threatening finger. “Clarke is asleep and you’ll not wake her, understand? You aren’t the only who’s had an exciting day.”

The wolf’s face relaxed, and Lexa was pretty sure he was glaring at her. She never knew wolves could glare but Aden was a prime example that they definitely could.

Lexa slowly ran her fingers through his fur and she released the breath she’d been holding when she felt Aden relax. “Alright, good boy,” she whispered, and with a small smile and Aden wagging his tail Lexa freed him and let him jump over the railing. Her smile widened as she watched him stretch, shaking his fur before being taken over by a sneeze. “Bless you,” Lexa said offhandedly, briefly scratching his ear before walking around the other side of the car.

Lexa could see Clarke was awake through the window, but it was clear she’d just woken up, as her nose was scrunched and her eyes were narrowed from how she’d accidently angled herself directly into the sun’s light. At that she let out a small hiss and swore under her breath.

The sight made Lexa swallow dryly.

She was far too beautiful.

Lexa gently knocked against the car window and Clarke turned to her, but when their eyes met that grimace that had taken ahold of her face split into a wide smile. Soon Lexa was stepping aside and Clarke was getting out. Clarke stumbled a little as she was still recovering from the abrupt nap and it earned her a glare from the blonde when Lexa found herself smirking at her.

“I’ve just gotta’ drop my stuff off here and then I’ll take you to your Mum’s. Just wait here,” Lexa asked, moving and grabbing the bags of shopping from the car. It was mostly groceries that she’d run on her mother’s behalf, and Lexa was halfway through balancing three bags in one hand when she found someone gently praying two of them away.

Lexa’s mouth was instantly opening to protest as Clarke took some of the load, but Clarke cut her off with a soft, “let me,” and since Lexa apparently couldn’t say no to her she simply sighed and caved without complaint.

They made their way down the familiar path, slipping through the fence and towards home. In the corner of her eye she watched how Clarke intently observed the surroundings, seeming to take into detail every little thing, every inch and corner. As they stepped up onto the veranda Lexa used her free hand to scrounge into her pocket for her keys, cursing more than once when her fingers grazed the key in her pocket but missed because of how sweaty her palms were, but eventually she managed to bring it out and unlocked the front door.

“It’s not much,” Lexa commented, letting Clarke go through first. “But it’s home.”

Lexa gave Clarke a few moments to take in her new surroundings and quietly shuffled past her. She had only taken a few steps however until she noticed they weren’t alone, and she looked up to see Indra leaning against the wall near the kitchen, arms crossed and brow raised. Except then Lexa stepped to the side, opening Indra’s view to Clarke, and Indra’s entirety stiffened. And if that wasn’t weird enough on its own, when Lexa frowned and glanced behind her to Clarke she saw _she_ had frozen too.

“My god,” Indra whispered, and she abruptly pulled herself up, brought her arms to her side. She let out a breathless chuckle. “You’re alive.”

Lexa blinked.

_The fuck?_

“Uhh…” Lexa slowly put the shopping bag on the ground and she noticed Clarke did too. Clarke’s eyes were still glued to Indra and when Lexa looked closer, she noticed the small smile that she had on, the disbelief and odd warmness of it.

And because Lexa wasn’t already confused enough she watched as her mother smiled back at her. Indra. Smiling. At Clarke. Who, fucking apparently, she _knew?_

“So are you,” Clarke replied, and like Indra’s, her voice was breathless, was drenched in more awe than anything else.

Indra’s gaze flickered down, and at seeming to find Aden, a surprised but delighted grin spread on her features. “Still surrounded by wolves I see,” she teased, goddamn _teased_ , and Lexa’s head whirled onto Clarke when she laughed softly in response that was far too familiar for supposed strangers.

“Not the same wolf,” Clarke corrected, though her smile still remained fond. “But yes, always.”

Indra shook her head at her and Lexa honestly felt like she’d been thrown into an alternate universe.

“Okay uh, would someone like to please tell me what the f—“ Indra’s gaze switched to her and Lexa swallowed her words. “What the _hell_ is going on?”

Lexa watched as Clarke and her mother shared a glance. Indra sighed softly before she seemed to make her mind up on something. “Clarke, you are right to entertain yourself for a bit?” Clarke tilted her head at her but nodded anyway. Indra returned the nod. “Good. Wait here in the living room, oh and,” she raised a finger at Aden, “I’m guessing you will not leave him outside?”

Clarke simply stared at her and Indra had her answer.

“Alright,” she sighed, but it was with an odd warmth that had Lexa sneaking her hand to her wrist to pinch herself. At finding that she did not, in fact, wake up from whatever dream she was having, Lexa resigned herself to the knowledge that apparently this was real. “But he doesn’t touch the furniture.” Indra warned.

Clarke gave her a grin and bobbed her head, and just as she began to peel herself away to presumably explore the room she caught Lexa’s gaze. She seemed to sense Lexa’s slight distress at whatever the fuck was going on, because the grin softened into a reassuring smile and she briefly touched Lexa’s wrist. Lexa didn’t understand the tension that eased from her shoulders because of it.

“Lexa,” Indra called and Lexa tore her gaze off Clarke as she and Aden wandered deeper to the living room. “Come, we should talk.”

“You think?” Lexa muttered under her breath, relieved that Indra didn’t seem to hear her. She followed her mother into the kitchen, reaching there a little later after Indra as she had doubled back to the grab the bags of shopping to bring in as well. She felt like her head was spinning and was sure to fall off when she heaved the bags onto the counter and then spun to face her mother with a barrage of questions already on the tip of her tongue. Indra saw though and raised a hand, and it felt almost physically painful when Lexa forced herself to bite her tongue and wait for mother to speak.

Indra seemed grateful. She sighed and briefly closed her eyes, and when she opened them again her gaze pierced right through her. “Do you remember when you were eight?” she started, her voice oddly gentle.

“You may need to be more specific.”

Indra shook her head at her but continued. “Do you remember when you were eight and I told you that there had been an attack on the precinct, after much pestering from you when I had to go hospital and you refused to leave or really do _anything_ until I told you why I had been admitted?”

Lexa’s gaze dropped to her shoes. She did remember, quite vividly, but that was mostly because of how terrified she had been. The details weren’t all too clear but what _was_ clear was just how plain scared she’d been, having strangers come to her home and tell her how her Mum had been put into hospital. It made her smile a bit to remember that she had been very amendment on finding the cause of why her mother was hurt. She’d always been a bit protective, even at a young age.

“And when I told you that terrorists had attacked the precinct and I had fought off some bad men and had gotten badly injured, you asked me why, you asked me why did I throw myself into danger like that?” Lexa raised her eyes and locked sights with Indra again, her brow furrowing slightly as she tried to work out where Indra was going with this.

“You told me it was because they had been after a little girl like me. That you wanted to give her time to get away.” Lexa said, and it was slow the way the realisation came upon her, the widening of her eyes and dropping of her jaw.

Indra smiled slightly at her. “That little girl, the runaway with blue eyes and blonde hair,” she chuckled in what could only be disbelief, “is the same girl that is in our living room.”

Lexa blinked at her.

Somehow she felt even more dumbfounded than when she’d first walked into the room.

“That’s… that’s _insane_ ,” Lexa breathed and Indra’ smile morphed into a smirk.

“Perhaps.” She shrugged, abruptly pulling herself up and walking over. She pulled open the shopping bags and began to unpack them into the kitchen. “When you came to me for Abby’s address and said something about a daughter I… I didn’t let myself hope. There are few things I regret Lexa, but one of my greatest was letting that little girl go without knowing if she’d be okay. I’d always feared she’d gotten killed. That I’d be responsible.”

Lexa felt the tension melt out of her. “It wouldn’t be your fault,” she assured and Indra shot her smile because of it. She shrugged again and continued shuffling around the kitchen.

“I do mean what I said before, about being careful. It is a miracle that she’s survived. That girl… I don’t know. There is something odd about her.” Indra didn’t seem to notice how Lexa stiffened. “But, her life has been shadowed by danger, and while I am grateful that she seems to be well, I do not want you getting hurt because of her.”

Lexa clenched her jaw. “I won’t.”

Indra paused from where she’d been opening a cupboard. “How sure are you of that?” she questioned, raising a brow.

But Lexa held her ground. “The danger is passed. She’s… she’s just a person now. Like me and everyone else.” Lexa decided to _not_ mention that Clarke was quite entirely the opposite of everyone else. She could grow literal fucking wings for one.

Indra gave her a look that Lexa couldn’t read before she simply blew out a breath through her nose and finished packing away the last of the shopping. She leant towards the counter and gripped the edges. Momentarily her sight flicked up into the living room at the sound of laughing, and Lexa’s gaze involuntarily shifted up too, if only because the sound of Clarke’s laughing made her bones feel like jelly.

She watched as Clarke swatted Aden’s nose from which Lexa assumed of him misbehaving, Aden letting out an indignant huff in response and playfully biting her ankle in retaliation. Lexa was powerless to suppress her small fond smile, but it shocked her a little when she managed to pull her sight off her and to her mother, to see her smiling a little too.

“I am also going to sincerely hope that you are not planning on hiding her here.” Indra commented, and she continued before Lexa could throw in a retort. “Your heart is the biggest I’ve ever known Lexa,” Indra cut off, and her eyes drilled into Lexa’s own with a knowing glint. “You have a habit of taking in strays.”

“I do not.” Lexa huffed.

Indra merely raised a brow. “Should I not bring up the argument of your cat? Who, to my knowledge, was indeed a stray?”

Lexa opened her mouth then closed it.

She got her there.

Indra huffed a laughed at her and Lexa rolled her eyes. “She’s staying at her Mum’s actually,” Lexa explained and Indra’s eyes widened at her, her chuckle abruptly cutting off.

“She has found Abby?” Indra breathed.

Lexa frowned a little at the hope and awe in her voice and nodded.

Indra’s smile was wide. “She will be happy.” She grinned, and Lexa smiled with her.

“She is.” Lexa affirmed and she watched as Indra’s shoulders finally fully sagged, the last of the tension and unease gone.

They shared a grin before in synch they focused their gazes back on Clarke. Like always Clarke seemed to sense her gaze, because it wasn’t long until Clarke was pausing from where she’d been examining photo frames on the fireplace and met her eyes, and it was incredible to watch how her entire demeanour softened so beautifully.

When Clarke beamed at her Lexa felt her blood sing.

It was so wonderfully strange to feel the happiness that pounded beneath her ribs.

-

They had a month and a half until school was to start once more for its final year.

A month for Clarke to prepare herself.

The decision to go to school had been a shocking one when Clarke had brought it up with her Mum. They had been sitting together on the couch and together they were flipping through a catalogue for furniture and decorations, to see if there was anything that caught her eye. Abby also took advantage of it to use the magazine to explain a few words and concepts. There had been a moment after Abby had somehow landed into a geography lesson after Clarke had asked about the word ‘IKEA’ and then Abby had gone on about Sweden and the consequently a bunch of other countries, when Clarke found herself suddenly jolted back to when she was twelve.

Her mother must have felt the same way too, because at the same time they paused, Abby’s hand still caught in mid gesture.

But then Clarke had simply smiled, felt her chest ease with the weights that were shoved off, and Abby continued.

It was in a beat of silence, the only sound the flipping of the catalogue pages that Clarke finally brought up the idea that had been bubbling up in her throat for days now. Because she had heard Lexa talk about it, had learned about it through television shows she’d been watching and even an attempt at the internet. She loved learning, she really did, and that was what school was, or supposed to be at least.

“You’ve… you’ve missed an incredible amount Clarke,” her mother had stated softly, gently squeezing her hand. “It would be very difficult, probably stressful too. You’re only just adjusting and—“

“I can catch up,” Clarke interrupted.

But Abby just stared at her. “It’s _years_ worth, Clarke.”

“You always said I learn fast.” Clarke muttered. She narrowed her eyes. “I could do it.”

In the end it wasn’t the logistics of it that had won her the argument, but instead near the finish when frustration had gotten the better of her and she’d muttered out how for just, _one_ thing, she wanted it to be _normal_ , she wanted to experience something she had been convinced her entire life she would never get the chance to achieve. Her entire life she had never been able to think past the next day, just repeating the same cycle, the same life. And yes, she _did_ love the woods and the forest and everything about it, but this was different—this was entirely different.

This was human.

So with that, her mother had caved.

Abby promised she’d look into it and make arrangements, and it was with that that Clarke learned that Marcus, her mother’s new mate, Clarke had gathered, that he was actually a principal at a nearby high school. The one she had interest in too, as apparently _his_ school was the one that Lexa went to.

It wasn’t that she didn’t like Marcus, because she _sort of_ did. He was kind and gentle and she could never hold anger against him, because sometimes she could feel his soul if she concentrated hard enough, and she’d see how light it was, how _warm_. So it wasn’t that she hated him, because she really didn’t.

But there was something. Some tension that was ever-present in her neck when he was around. It was a little infuriating, because she couldn’t place _why_ it was like that, _why_ she was always the slightest bit wary in his presence. Yet like he always seemed to be he was kind and understanding when he’d asked her about it after Abby had talked with him. He was willing to give her the chance, so Clarke simply bit her tongue and forced the grateful smile that should have come natural.

It was a grueling daily process, constant hours of work at a desk that followed for the month. Binging books and films and TV shows and magazines and just _everything_ she could her hands on. Lectures from Abby, and eventually Marcus, at his insistence that for any other kid would probably have driven her insane.

But she wasn’t any other kid.

And she still loved learning.

She did notice the looks that Marcus was growing though, the more lessons they went through together. It would always shock him, every time, just how insanely _fast_ she’d pick everything up. Abby was surprised too, but only a little, as there was a knowing glint in her eye as she’d glance at Marcus’ dropped jaw when Clarke would easily recite whatever needed. Clarke didn’t think that Marcus knew what she was, but she had picked up through conversations that she probably shouldn’t have been listening on what Abby had told him about her.

Okay, so sure, she knew that you weren’t _really_ meant to eavesdrop on people, especially when your hearing was superior and she could kind of cheat a little, but she couldn’t help it. Because she learnt what Abby had been telling everyone, if it ever came up, somehow, that her daughter had been dead. That was what she’d told Marcus too. That she did _have_ a daughter, but she wasn’t here anymore.

It explained his reaction at least, to when she’d first shown up at the doorstep. It made her respect Marcus a little more, feel a tad more at ease, to know that he had been acting protective of her that day. After living with wolves near her entire life, it was hard to break the mindset of how a mate was supposed to be. She had also been corrected more than once by Abby that Marcus wasn’t her ‘mate’ but her fiancé.

She still called him Abby’s mate in her head.

But her learning wasn’t restricted to just education though, and it was _this_ type of learning that she truly loved and looked forward too as she got do it every Saturday with Lexa. Lexa would come over for it, give her the same grin when she’d open the door for her and the same tight embrace like they hadn’t seen each other in years rather a week.

And for Lexa, she called her mate in her head too.

You see while it was easy to learn through books and lectures for her there was one thing that had to be done in person. That her mother nor Marcus couldn’t do. Something that only really Lexa could do, as she was the only one who knew exactly of her position, and could help her out of it.

Lexa was the one who came over to teach her how to be human.

It was more showing than anything. The topics teenagers talk about, the way she should sit, how it was decidedly _not_ appropriate to throw someone into the ground for daring to cross into your territory—apparently territories weren’t a thing for human’s either—and Clarke honestly loved every second that Lexa spent teaching her.

Normally Clarke found herself a pretty good student, she sat and she listened attentively and took it all in, but with Lexa, her attention had a habit of traveling elsewhere. Because although she _knew_ she should be paying attention to the things she’d show and teach, there were other things that stole her gaze, like when she had managed a pop culture reference and Lexa’s face had lit up and she’d raised her hand excitedly.

Clarke had simply titled her head at her at the odd gesture, but then Lexa had laughed and leant forward, gently grabbing Clarke’s own hand and tugging forward so that her palm was flattened against Lexa’s.

“It’s a high five,” Lexa had explained, and Clarke had watched her with a crease in her brow as she’d taken her hand back and suddenly slapped Clarke’s with it. “Like that.”

Clarke’s hand had remained raised so Lexa gently pushed it back down. “Why?” Clarke asked, frowning slightly.

“You do it to celebrate something. But like, small _and_ big things you know? Say if your friend made a joke that’s only for you to get and they raise their hand, you high five them.” In demonstration Lexa had raised her hand again, her palm flat.

Clarke remembered what Lexa had done and attempted to give her a high five.

And when Lexa smiled with such happiness from it Clarke felt her heart flutter, she grinned with her too, and that smile became stuck in her mind for weeks after.

Because normally Clarke figured herself good at paying attention to what was being said, but with Lexa it was harder, as every time Clarke would do something right Lexa would give her this smile, this goddamn _fucking_ smile that made her feel like the sun had risen in her chest, and how the hell was she supposed to concentrate in the face of that? The softness and tenderness and the simply _gentle_ way that she went through all these things, how was she ever supposed to not get lost in Lexa’s gaze when she looked at her like that? Fight the urge to taste that smile with her lips?

She did hold back though, because she noticed how seriously Lexa seemed to be taking this tutoring, and since it was Lexa, Clarke would never do something to upset her, so she refrained.

But if she ended up staring at Lexa’s lips when she thought she wasn’t looking then that’s entirely not her fault.

Today was one of Lexa’s days, as Clarke had come to mentally call it. School was due to start in just a few days so Lexa had called her and told her she’d be coming a little earlier. Clarke was still struggling with the use of the phone Abby had gotten her and had been immensely proud she’d answered Lexa’s call and everything—she could practically _hear_ the proud smile that Lexa had on too, so she took that as the bigger victory—and now she was simply sat on the living room floor with Aden’s head in her lap, her fingers idly running through his fur.

It was strange to not be able to hunt anymore or run through the forest with Aden. Instead they’d walk together through the neighbourhood and the nearest park she could find. Luckily they seemed to be close to a gardens of some sort, and often Clarke found herself trailing down the paths and grass with Aden, the wolf bumping against her side. Sometimes at night she’d sneak out the window in her room and land carefully onto the ground below. Calling Aden she would go back to those parks, but with no one there she was free to run without restraint, and she knew Aden shared her enthusiasm, and sometimes it was for hours that she got to feel her soul just _breathe_.

A knock at the door had her eyes snapping up from where she’d been reading a book in one hand. With an eager grin she scrambled up to her feet, pointedly ignoring Aden’s irritated growl at losing his headrest, and sprinted for the door. She swung it upon not a second later and was greeted with the same grin that Lexa gave her every time they saw each other. In ritual she stepped forward and pulled her into a hug that had her body melting into the other girl, and the relieved sigh that slipped from her nose she felt echoed from Lexa against the shell of her ear.

“How are you?” Lexa asked as she pulled away, Clarke reluctantly leaning back too and stepping aside to let her in.

“Good,” Clarke smiled, and she meant it, it had been a whirlwind of constant work and studying, but she was happier than she’d been in a long while. “And you?”

“Better now.” Lexa smirked and before Clarke could roll her eyes at her Aden was suddenly barreling down the hallway and lunging at Lexa. It was only through repeated reprimanding from Clarke that he refrained from quite literally tackling her to the ground, and instead sufficed for standing up on his hind legs and pushing his front paws up against her.

When Lexa simply laughed delighted in response and used both hands to cup his face Clarke shook her head and sighed.

Still, she had to bite back her grin. “He’s missed you,” Clarke offered, and she said it every time, as Aden’s reaction to Lexa was the same every time. And of course, like every time, Lexa gave her that small smile, and gently gave a quick kiss to Aden’s head. She stepped back and his paws clicked against the floor as he landed on all fours.

“He is very clingy,” Lexa insulted affectionately, and her and Lexa traded grins.

Clarke scoffed. “Should have seen him when he was pup.” Touching Lexa’s wrist to gather her attention she began leading them back into the living room. “He was much worse, _don ste yu, Aden_?”

Aden growled and nipped her hand before treading off and falling into a comfortable heap on the rug by the couch. Clarke hopped onto the couch and sat crossed legged, pulling up her bare feet, while Lexa took off her shoes and mimicked. They turned so they were directly facing each other and Clarke perhaps enjoyed it a little too much when Lexa’s face drew in its seriousness. It was much too fascinating to watch how her entire demeanour could change within a blink.

“Okay, we only have a few days left now.” Lexa started, and Clarke forced herself to grow serious too. “You feeling okay?”

Clarke shrugged.

Lexa’s brow furrowed a little in its concern. “Are you nervous?”

“Yes,” Clarke admitted quietly. Lexa offered her a reassuring smile and reached across the gap between them, glancing to her for permission before gently taking one of her hands and tangling it with her own.

“It’ll be okay, I promise,” Lexa assured, and Clarke felt something akin to her very soul relaxing at the contact. Lexa’s hands were warm and Clarke never wanted to let go. “And besides, you’ll have me. Probably not in all your classes but, I’ll be there, the entire time, if you ever need me.”

“I have you.” Clarke murmured, squeezing their joined grip.

Lexa smiled something that would make the heavens jealous. “Yeah, you have me.” She whispered back.

They spent a moment or two staring at each other before Lexa abruptly pulled in a shaky breath.

“Alright, quick test then. You ready?” Lexa asked, raising her brow.

Clarke nodded. “Ready.”

She enjoyed Lexa’s teaching. It was fun and relaxing to go through the numerous questions that Lexa had come up with and answer them, the meaning of certain slang words, the way the typical person would react to things. The sun had fallen a little further by the time they were just about done, and Clarke found herself getting a tad too distracted to the way Lexa’s brunette hair flowed over her shoulders, the light slightly baggy shirt she had on due to the hot weather, so when Lexa asked her one of the last questions she found herself feeling a little mischievous.

“Alright, and what do you do if someone insults you?”

“Challenge them to a duel for daring to dishonour me.” Clarke said seriously.

Lexa raised a brow at her.

But Clarke was the first to crack into a smile.

Clarke rolled her eyes. “See if they meant it playfully or not.” At Lexa’s nod Clarke found her smile dipped into a cheeky grin. “If they do not mean it playfully, _then_ you challenge them.”

Lexa playfully hit her shoulder but it only made Clarke giggle, and it wasn’t long till Lexa was laughing with her and an equally wide grin was on her face. “Well,” Lexa sighed, and the happiness that brightened her voice made Clarke a little breathless. “I think that’s it. You’ve officially passed Manners Boot Camp.”

“‘Boot Camp?’” Clarke said with a chuckle. She shook her head. “You need to stop calling this that.”

“Why not?” Lexa huffed and it was far too adorable. In reply Clarke simply leaned forward and used her free hand to gently tuck one of the many wild curls behind her ear. At the gesture Lexa blushed and Clarke reveled in it. “Right,” Lexa suddenly said, clearing her throat, and Clarke just barely bit back her smile. “There’s just one last thing we need to go over then you should be good.”

Clarke remained silent in cue to go on. She watched intently as Lexa drew in a nervous breath.

“Well, since I’m assuming you’ll be sitting with me and stuff, that means you’ll be sitting with my friends. And they can be a bit… much. I don’t want you to get overwhelmed,” Lexa explained and the care to her words made Clarke’s chest ache. “You’ve already met Raven and O, but, well, we all tend to hang together as a pack so it’s very likely that you’ll spending time with all of them.” Lexa’s nose scrunched slightly. “It probably doesn’t help that it’s through _me_ that you’re being introduced to the group. I’m… not exactly known for my social abilities.”

Clarke felt a slow smile spread on her lips as Lexa kept talking, and it was one of the widest and brightest that she had felt in weeks. At seeing it Lexa seemed to get lost in staring at her. “You... want to introduce me to your pack?”

Lexa flushed like she always did whenever she talked like that. “They’re not a pack,” she quickly said, except almost as quickly did she furrow her brows. “Well, we all do tend to travel together _in_ a pack but like… we’re not, _a_ pack. Just… my friends.”

Clarke hummed, her smile still wide on her lips and Lexa blushed again.

“ _Anyway_ uh, I’m just going to give you a quick rundown yeah? So it’s not all so intense when you meet them. Because I have no doubt they will be entirely inappropriate with you so, may as well beat them to the punch.” Lexa swallowed and Clarke got a little distracted in watching her throat bob. She blinked to bring herself back. “So, there’s six of us, seven including me. The guys can be assholes at times but their hearts in the right place.”

Lexa proceeded to list off her friends—Lexa’s pack—and Clarke found herself feeling grateful that Lexa wasn’t making her go in blind for when she would meet them in a few days time. She learnt all their names, Lincoln, Bellamy, Jasper, Monty, and of course Raven and Octavia who she’d already met. She learnt that Bellamy was Octavia’s brother and had started school deliberately a year later so he could be in the same year as her, that Jasper and Monty came in a pair and while Jasper was often infuriating Monty was one of the most gentle and kindest of the group.

Usually Lexa’s sister would be with them, as well as this girl called Echo, but according to Lexa they had graduated last year and so weren’t going to be with them. Lexa had also admitted a little shyly that it was going to be her first year without Anya at her side, and though she’d never admit it her sister’s face, she was actually going to miss her and it’d feel quite strange.

Lexa let out a long breath when she was done talking, and it was more instinct than anything that Clarke’s free hand came out and gently squeezed her thigh in some offer of reassurance. It was odd how Lexa seemed to both relax and stiffen at the exact same time.

“Okay, I think that’s enough talking for today.” Lexa suddenly pulled away and leant down at her side to dig through her bag she’d brought with her. Clarke ignored the loss of warmth she felt when Lexa’s hands left where they’d been clutching hers. Her regret was short lived though when Lexa was back again, a laptop in her hands and a nervous smile on her lips. “Netflix?” she timidly asked, like Clarke could ever say no to her.

Clarke laughed softly but nodded, shifting so that their sides were pressed together. Lexa somehow managed to balance the laptop in the middle using both their legs, and when it seemed like the device wasn’t swaying precariously anymore she shot Clarke a grin and went on to find the show they’d been watching.

Clarke did enjoy it, it was a light hearted cop show that made her laugh even if a lot of the references went over her head, but far more did she enjoy when Lexa laughed too, when she’d hear it so close to her ear. Sometimes she spent more watching the girl beside her than the show itself.

Lexa didn’t seem to mind.

-

“ _Aden no, bak yu op._ ” Clarke repeated for the fifth time, and like all the previous times he whined loudly in response and Clarke had to ignore the painful twisting of her heart. “ _Ai na kom daun._ ” She promised gently.

Aden huffed again from where she kept pushing him back from following her out the front door. Lexa stood a few paces behind her, patiently waiting, but even Clarke could see that Aden’s reluctance to let her leave was pressing on her heart too.

Clarke sighed, letting her bag fall to the ground and crouching down in front of him. She grabbed the sides of his face, forced him to look directly at her, and tried to force on as much calmness and reassurance as she could to help ease the young wolf.

“ _Nou fir raun._ ” Clarke whispered, and though she felt Aden’s whisper of a reply in her mind, another last plea for her to stay, it seemed that he had finally accepted it now. He stopped shuffling around, his body suddenly going still as defeat set in his eyes. Clarke offered him a sad smile before she leant forward and gently pressed a kiss to his head, briefly threading her fingers through his ruff.

When she stood up and stepped back, Aden didn’t try to grab at her shirt with his teeth like he had done before, so Clarke offered him one last whisper of goodbye just as she picked up her bag and walked over to Lexa. Lexa’s hand came out and gently squeezed Clarke’s arm, giving her a reassuring smile as she led her to her car.

It was her first day today.

There were nerves that she hadn’t felt in a long while that curled in her belly, but there was excitement as well. It was going to be a entirely new experience for her, something she’d never even let herself hope of getting the chance of, so the fact that now she could—she _was_ —she was so anxiously excited it was making it hard to breathe.

And that wasn’t even counting the fact that she had Lexa with her.

They didn’t talk much as they drove. But the silence was comfortable, and Clarke, as seems to be growing habit, merely stared out he window the majority of the drive, still enjoying like when she was little to watch the world blur past so incredibly fast. The closer they got the more the streets became dotted with teenagers and people, until eventually they pulled up in the parking lot, just managing the last free space.

Clarke pulled in a shuddering breath. They didn’t immediately get out the car, and when Clarke looked to her side she saw Lexa was already watching her.

“You ready?” Lexa asked softly.

Clarke gave her a smile, reached a hand across and let it trail gently down Lexa’s arm. “Mostly.”

Lexa returned the smile, but hers was a little more reassuring, and with it Clarke found the courage to finally make the move. To get up, push open the car door and walk to what would be her first day of school since her entire life. She had prepared as much as she could, and assured herself anyway she had faced worse things, _much_ worse things. Had gotten lost in unfamiliar woods, been hunted like a dog since the day she was born, had fought bears and wolves and men. This was nothing, this _should_ be nothing.

She must have gotten too caught up in her own head, because she was surprised when she found a hesitant hand being slid into her own. Clarke glanced down at the joined grip, her eyes flicking up to meet Lexa’s. Lexa gave her a reassuring squeeze.

And with that, Clarke thought she’d be okay.

The day was more an ‘orientation’ day—a new word she’d learned—than anything, being shown around the school campus and meeting all her teachers and classmates. While Polis wasn’t the biggest and meant that she did stick out more than usual as the new girl, she was not the only new student, and all the students in year level seemed far more interested in the coming academic year than new people.

It made it easier to blend in. Easier to absorb and listen and take in. It was also habit it seemed, the way she could naturally fall to the background and be an observer. Being brought up where stealth was what stood between you and getting fed, it wasn’t much of a surprise that something so engrained was still there. Still in the way she stood, watched the room. Nothing went wrong for her first three classes, thankfully, so when the lunch bell rang Clarke was happy to pack her things and head off to meet Lexa.

She’d only made it two steps out the door till the found the girl, Clarke unable to tame her grin at seeing Lexa leaning near the door just outside of her class. Their eyes met at the same time and Clarke didn’t hesitate to step forward and pull her into a quick hug.

Clarke felt Lexa instantly melt into her like their bodies were moulded for each other.

“You going alright?” Lexa asked as she pulled away. Clarke gave her a nod, and as she brought her arms down she tangled her hand with Lexa’s own. The shy smile she got from it made Clarke beam.

“So far, so good,” Clarke replied, glad she did as Lexa’s eyes lit up a little in their pride for her use of the human saying.

Lexa hesitated for a beat, her eyes flicking down, before she seemed to shake her head at herself and tugged her along. “Come on,” Lexa encouraged. “We need to eat, plus,” she let out a shuddered breath, “time to face the music.”

Clarke tilted her head at her.

Lexa’s nervous smile grew soft. “Face the music, it means to get it over with. Get something done. Time to meet my friends.”

Clarke nodded her understanding and let Lexa lead them outside, the sun suddenly shining down on them as they stepped out onto the grass. For a second Clarke let her eyes close, let the warmth sink into her skin, and it brought back all those summer mornings in the forests. When she’d spend a breath to just absorb the light, the heat, only to most likely be disturbed by Sasha for taking too long.

But the moment passed quick, and soon Clarke was opening her eyes and following on after Lexa.

She knew they’d found them when she felt Lexa’s grip on her hand suddenly tighten. Clarke watched intently of the tightness that traveled through Lexa’s form, tension in her jaw and shoulders rising. Clarke tore her gaze off Lexa and followed where her stare seemed to set on, spotting a group of people lounging around on what looked to be an oak picnic-style bench. Clarke frowned when Lexa abruptly let go of her hand.

Lexa must have seen her furrowed brows because she squeezed her arm reassuringly. “It’s okay, I just– it’ll make it easier. Just for now.”

“For now.” Clarke murmured.

If Clarke could have it her way, she wouldn’t let go of Lexa’s hand till her last breath.

As they walked over Clarke let herself take in Lexa’s friends. She was quick to pick out Raven and Octavia, who sat together and both seemed to roll their eyes in tandem at a boy with floppy dark hair who was next to Octavia and scowling at them. On the other side of the table was another boy, but he was surprisingly bulkier and had dark skin, yet his gaze was soft as he stared at Octavia. Clarke noted that part curiously. Lastly was the two other boys who sat next to each other, and from the way one was gesturing near manically in his story to other, his goggles swaying from under his neck in his movements, it wasn’t hard to guess of who it was.

It was just as they had reached the table that the group seemed to collectively notice them. The boys, all spar for the one with the gentle gaze, grew wide-eyed. Then the one with floppy hair sprung from his seat and rushed around, though he managed to pull himself to an abrupt halt just before he crashed into Lexa.

“You’re alive,” the boy breathed, his smile wide and relieved, and it was clear he was just _itching_ to pull Lexa into a hug. But he didn’t make a move until Lexa huffed at him and initiated the embrace. It was quick, different Clarke saw to how she hugged her and Raven, but still was the affection clear.

The boy blinked once Lexa pulled away. Lexa rolled her eyes at him and playfully hit him in the shoulder. “Don’t make it weird Bellamy. Or you’ll never have another again.”

That seemed to snap him out of it at least, as his face split into a grin. “Glad to see you haven’t changed _too_ much then,” he teased, and before Lexa could hit him again Raven’s voice suddenly piped up.

“Not that this isn’t truly lovely and all, but I believe an introduction is to be made?” she quirked up a brow, her gaze purposely flicking to Clarke. Everyone’s head turned to her and Clarke subconsciously drew herself up. She mentally prepared for the worst, as the worst tended to be something that visited her often, but there was relief that eased her shoulders when the sights on her were simply curious. Nothing dangerous, nothing wary.

Lexa cleared her throat. The groups’ gaze didn’t shift off Clarke. “Yes uh, everyone, this is Clarke. She’s… new here.” Her eyes briefly caught hers, and Clarke saw the nerves there. She offered her a small smile in hopes it would bring her courage. It seemed to work. “Clarke, this is everyone. That’s Bellamy,” she gestured to the boy who she’d just hugged, and Bellamy gave her a grin. Lexa pointed to the boy with the soft gaze but hard body, “that’s Lincoln, my brother,” Lincoln gave her a wave as Lexa’s finger shifted to the boy with the goggles and the one with short black hair. “And that’s Jasper and Monty.”

Monty offered her a welcoming smile and Clarke instantly understood what Lexa had meant when she’d said he was one of the kindest of the group. The other one, Jasper, seemed to light up when Clarke’s gaze fell on him, but before his mouth could open, a smirk already planted on his lips Clarke felt Lexa step forward and raise a hand.

“Jasper I swear to everything that is holy if you don’t say something that a normal human being would say when meeting another I will destroy you and everything you stand for.”

Jasper’s jaw slowly clamped shut.

Clarke watched with some amusement as he gulped under Lexa’s presumably terrifying glare and meekly met Clarke’s gaze again, significantly _less_ excited than before. “Hello Clarke it’s nice to meet you.” He mumbled.

Clarke turned her head in time to catch Lexa’s dark smile. “Good choice.” Lexa smirked.

“It’s nice to meet you too,” Clarke offered quietly, and she perhaps enjoyed it a little much how Lexa subtly rolled her eyes at her and Jasper perked up in his seat.

“So, you’re new here?” Bellamy asked as he walked around and sat back down in his spot. Clarke followed Lexa as she led her to the free spots next to Lincoln. Lexa slid in first, Clarke going second and feeling especially pleased that their sides were pressed together.

“I am.” Clarke answered. It had been pounded into her head more times than one of her story of what she was doing here. “Just moved here.”

“Where you from?” Monty asked, leaning forward so he could make eye contact with her.

Clarke’s smile was mischievous, but only to those who knew her. “Rural town. You wouldn’t have heard of it.”

“You been given a tour?” Bellamy questioned.

Clarke’s eyes briefly flicked over to Lexa. “Lexa has been showing me around.”

Raven grinned wide at that. “I bet she has. You been giving her a _personal_ tour Lexa? Showing her all the secret sights?” Octavia elbowed Raven in the side and it made Clarke grin when she yelped. “Hey!” she snapped.

“Don’t be stupid, Rae.” Octavia deadpanned. “I’d like to apologise of Raven’s behalf Clarke. Unfortunately, she is always like this.”

Raven gasped dramatically and it was amazing how everyone seemed to sigh.

“Are you here for the rest of the year?” Monty went on, seeming to ignore how Octavia and Raven had fallen into a bicker. By the way no one reacted to the pair’s quarrel Clarke assumed it happened often.

“Yeah, I should be.” Clarke said, and though she tried to keep her tone sure, it ended up more hopeful. Lexa seemed to notice too. Because while Clarke was glad she was here, that she had a chance, she was still apprehensive. Still waiting for the other shoe to drop. Any time she’d had something good, something even _resembling_ stable and sure, so quick was it to fall apart. She hoped she got to stay here for the year. Hopefully even longer.

But past experience made her cautious.

Lexa’s hand was subtle when it slipped under the table. Carefully, she felt timid fingers wrap around her wrist, slide into her hands. The warmth of their joined grip made the strangest feeling of contentment bloom in her chest. And when she looked up, when she saw Lexa’s ever-present gaze, the softness and care in her eyes. When she looked around at Lexa’s friends and saw how quickly and easily they had accepted her, no questions asked, no hesitation.

It was a wonderful feeling. A strange feeling, but a good one, that slowly built in her chest.

So when she heard the tail end of Raven and Octavia’s argument, watching as Raven shoved Octavia hard enough that she fell off the bench and onto the ground, Clarke didn’t try to stop the laughter that bubbled up her throat.

She simply laughed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> currently on a lovely 24 hour flight (kill me) to the UK, so if we're lucky ill go on a writing binge and have a new chapter up soon. im hoping to keep a semi-reg schedule for this story if i can.  
> as always, thank you for reading. really means a lot.  
> (also i know it aint realistic for clarke to jump into school last year but... i wanted high school shenanigans okay? and she's an angel anyway. i can get away with it. (totally not the main reason i always do supernatural fics shhh))
> 
> translations (a decidedly lesser amount):  
> Brandwoda - Fool  
> don ste yu, Aden? - Weren’t you, Aden?  
> Aden no, bak yu op - Aden no, stay back  
> Ai na kom daun - I will return  
> Nou fir raun - Do not be afraid


End file.
